In the process of divorcing my husband. We've been separated 2.5 years now and if anything things are getting worse.
He is controlling and everything needs to be his terms or nothing. We've had situation after situation where he's used the children as a weapon against me. Having felt extremely let down by CAFCASS (they said 50/50 wasn't best for the children due to his emotional blackmail and abuse towards me and them and then said that they weren't against it 2 weeks later) I reluctantly agreed to a 50/50 child arrangement order as my barrister told me that the court would likely go with CAFCASS anyway. I thought he'd be happy at this and leave me alone but he's still so awful. Accusation after accusation via the parenting app and just so so spiteful. I try my best to stay calm and manage to most of the time but he's now slagging off my family and just being awful. I've told him I just want to be amicable with him (mostly for the children's sake) but he's admitted that he will never be amicable with me.
How am I supposed to deal with him? He is so so bitter that I left him he is just relentless.
We are in the process of finalising our financial situation (final hearing in April). He has stayed in the family home, has been lent enough money to buy me out and pay off the existing mortgage but is maintaining he only has enough money to pay me so and so amount (not as much as I feel I'd get if I went to court). Taking into consideration barrister fees, the stress and the fact that the house might have to be sold (so potentially won't be able to move on for a year) I'm contemplating accepting. Now I know if I do we will have to draw up a consent order and get it approved by the court and he's now saying he won't pay a penny towards it as he doesn't see the need in getting one. He doesn't have older relatives so I won't be able to go after inheritance down the line (his own words) so he doesn't see the need. Now I know 100% that we need a consent order, so if I agree out of court I will be paying for it (as I paid to take him to court in the first place as he refused to sell the house and give me my equity share).
He's just relentless and I don't know what to do. Previous judges have thrown the book at him because of his previous behaviour so part of me wants to go to court to make sure what I get is fair but it's just so stressful and the idea of not being able to move on with the equity from the house due to it having to be sold is awful.
All our communication is through a parenting app but he's still being awful and it's just relentless.
Any advice will be greatly appreciated :-)