Help.. really scared with recent shared care recommendation.

[Helpless99]

I'm scared.
I've been in very long and protracted child arrangements hearings with ex.
Proven domestic abuse from him. Abuse findings made against me too.
Various expert reports which recommended supervised only.
Supervised went well so went to unsupervised then overnights. The problems started in overnights.
Most recent is local authority involvement, local authority believe I've been emotionally manipulating DD as she's expressed she doesn't like her dad etc yet enjoys contact with him.
Overnight contact happened but broke down as DD was so distressed.
Local Authority now make a recommendation of shared care, one week on and off format which would be devastating for DD. She'd lose so much that she currently is able to do. She's never gone a day without seeing me. I've been her primary carer since birth and raised her.
I've made a reasonable proposal of EOW contact and half the holidays. Shared care has so many practicalities and the father and I are high conflict and not amicable at all.

What are the chances of the Court going with this recommendation? Cafcass are yet to comment but I believe they're more along the lines of EOW and half the holidays with a possible midweek tea time but I can't be sure.

I don't think shared care is right but consistent contact is.

Anyone else been in this situation?

How old is DD?

Also you state abuse was found against you - do you mean your ex abused you or that you abused him or your child?

She's nearly 7.
Proven domestic abuse that he abused me and DD.
They made findings against me of abuse towards him as I retaliated at times.

Bumping

DD would likely settle in to week on-week off in time if you supported it and it was built up over a period of time. 2 nights first, slowly add a night every couple of weeks? If he goes for 50:50 and gets it, all other shared care arrangements would have many more hand overs per week where you would need to see him. This may be best for shared care if not amicable. But I wonder if maybe they will go with EOW, 50% holidays and a night during week.

I support EOW, midweek tea time and half the holidays. I don't support a week on and off. I've been DDs primary carer since birth. She's lived with me her entire life.

I thought the Court would usually stick to the status quo and chose the least disruptive option ?

Reading between the lines it sounds like the LA (do you mean social services?) want to change the current pattern because of how your daughter is reacting. You have more or less said it in your post. She is unsettled by the transfers not when she is with him. This option reduces the transfers in any given week.

It is about what is best for her. That might mean change.

Have they come right out and stated they think it is about your dynamic with her and where does the judge sit in this. Has he or she given any indication they might agree with this assessment.

When you state overnight contact broke down, what happened and how was the problem addressed? How often does she spend time with her dad at the moment?