I would like to give my ex another chance with contact, he hasn't seen the children in nearly 2 years and has reached out a few times to see them again recently however i've been reluctant to restart contact as he always always lets them down, this is a pattern of behaviour and not a new thing. he is extremely inconsistent, it goes like this he will see them for a while but be extremely inconsistent he will not stick to ANY schedule and will only see them as and when he feels like it and will contact me a few days before asking to see them never again set arrangements as he refuses to stick to anything, he will go months without seeing them and has never seen them regularly he will see them say every 2/3 months and would often cancel on the day/ night before with no explanation.. then eventually he will just disappear and not see them for a year then come back and do the same thing. he's been doing this for years and i've kept trying again,
contact stopped 2 years ago after he was meant to come down for one of their birthdays then didn't turn up. he's been back in contact recently asking to see them again and i would like to restart contact again as long as he can be consistent and see them regularly (eow for the day as he won't have them overnight) but how do i move past the resentment? what's holding me back is i am extremely angry and resentful towards him, he has barely seen them since we split 8 years ago, my youngest doesn't know or remember him and wouldn't recognise him. even before this he has never had them overnight, never cooked them dinner, never taken the to school or appointments, never paid any maintenance he only visited them at my house. i just feel so resentful towards him that he left me to raise them alone now it feels like he will be coming back when all the hard work is done?! i've been through some tough times with them where i really would have needed the support from the other parent but he didn't want to know. how do i put this resentment behind me and not let it affect things? i just feel angry he gets to pick up things years later and benefit from my hard work with them.. is it possible to move past this resentment and start again with coparenting? has anyone been in a situation with their ex coming back after a long period of absence and how did you move forward? i posted this in parenting but didn't get much responses so here may be better if anyone has been through this