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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Being lovebombed by current partner

3 replies

ArtfulBear · 16/11/2024 13:03

STBX is sometimes emotionally abusive, silent treatment and aggressive outbursts but not generally insults. He's aware that I'm nearing the end of my patience but I haven't explicitly told him I plan to leave.

Perhaps lovebombing isn't quite accurate, but he's busy trying to be partner and dad of the year. Everything is for my benefit, random bouts of cleaning, he's apparently also been to the GP. I really don't have the energy for this. I'm beginning to feel sorry for him, despite also finding his matyr act irritating. It's proving hard enough to navigate my grief and the practicalities of finding somewhere to live. I'm so tired and it feels so hard, I'd started looking forward to a new life and now I feel full of doubt and like it is slipping away.

OP posts:
banananapancake · 16/11/2024 15:21

Can you just ignore him?

ArtfulBear · 16/11/2024 16:10

I'm trying. I keep finding myself thinking that if he's willing to go to the doctor maybe he deserves a chance, even though he probably doesn't.

OP posts:
trailblazer42 · 16/11/2024 20:27

I’ve been there and now I’ve moved out I am still to some extent. Although now I get alternate declarations of love and hate.

What I always try to think of if I feel bad is how I have felt at a low point. Mine was agreeing to stay and ‘try’ with my husband and then having to shut myself in our bathroom and sobbing my heart out because I felt so very sad that I hadn’t been strong enough. When I have a wobble (never about my feelings, just about how I’ve made him feel) I think back to that and I know that feeling would be unbearable to live with.

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