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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

How to tell him.

2 replies

HandOld · 03/11/2024 08:16

V proud and difficult H. He openly admits to be revengeful. After years of emotional abuse and insults and refusing to pay for anything - I have to leave

I have young kids. A joint mortgage. Both work full time. The logistics of how we unravel ourselves is terrifying but even more so when he will be so incredibly angry. He has issues with women in general - and thinks women are "mad".

I don't know how to say it. I can't tell him the truth as he will just get so angry. I want him to somehow think it's his idea too. I mean he doesn't like me v much seemingly so in a way he might like it but his pride and ego will stop him from being able to see that

Do I just sit him down one evening? Do I leave with the DC? Leave by myself? I will happily blame myself and say "its me, not you" if it makes him less angry.

Any advice?

OP posts:
trailblazer42 · 03/11/2024 16:33

I didn’t think my STBEX liked me very much…then he’s done nothing but declare his love for me since I suggested separating. You may be surprised!

sunflowersngunpowdr · 03/11/2024 16:33

No experience of this but if he's angry by nature then don't do it alone. Have someone in the house with you in case he kicks off. Maybe ask them to record him if he starts shouting or being threatening. I wouldn't just leave with your kids unless you really feel unsafe. Sounds like a tough situation... good luck! X

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