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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Separation financial agreement?

2 replies

Mbm11 · 26/08/2024 21:54

My Husband is an alcoholic and it has taken over our lives the last couple of years. Apart from being zoned out of all areas of life, he has also reduced his income quite a lot and is now on a very low wage working part time (under £10k). Due to him reducing his work and generally not even considering where money is coming from I have had to increase my hours, currently earning around £30k.
We are lucky that we own 2 properties, both requiring renovation. He has currently moved out of the family home to the other properly as I couldn’t live with the daily stress and not knowing what each day with an alcoholic would bring. He is spending £800 ish monthly on just food/drink, which is extortionate for one person. This is on a credit card account in my name. He has only been putting a few hundred pounds a month towards these and our 2 property’s costs, so it’s a very unfair set-up!
At the moment I can’t see how we have a future as the emotional and mental abuse that I’ve suffered has been really hard to handle. Anyone who’s lived this daily hell will understand! I am considering if a legal separation would give us the chance to see what happens, but what security does it give regarding finances? Are assets and money split like they are with a divorce, or is everything considered joint still?
I am concerned that as I’ve been forced to earn more recently to keep the family afloat, I will be penalised and will get less out of any split as he’s not earning much.
Also, we do have a good amount of savings (that is there to be spent on the houses) and I’m concerned he will want ‘his share’ of that if I cut off the daily money/credit card, and that he could fritter away joint money if a legal separation doesn’t legally split the money (like in divorce).
Any help anyone could give would be really appreciated. It’s hard making this decision, but time to look after myself and our (adult) child first…x

OP posts:
Sunlounger25 · 26/08/2024 22:56

I would just go for the divorce now and split everything 50/50 (if you do t have kids). The longer you leave it, the more valuable the assets and the harder it will be. Cut off the sources of credit in your name - it might hurry the process a little too.

bosqueverde · 27/08/2024 07:23

Indeed.
I separated from my wife -alcoholic also- a year ago. I earned the family living for 20+ years, and most of parenting to relieve our dds from the constant suffering. The split isn't reflecting that but I see it as the price of their freedom.

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