Bloody Carpenters, bloody Alexa...

[BigBoysDontCry]

So after nearly 30 years together, we split last year but he's only been moved out 2 months.

I'm fine with it, relieved, happier on a day to day basis.

However, in my random music playing on Alexa, the Carpenters "we've only just begun" came on and I guess it's got me a bit maudlin. Just thinking about how we started so full of hope and looking forward to sharing our lives and yet here we are with some happy and some unhappy memories and we just didn't make it work. It's sad really.

Now I think Alexa is trolling me playing sentimental songs...

I need to switch it off and pull myself together. I swore I wasn't shedding another tear over this and I haven't for the last year.

How have you all dealt with the general sadness when the anger and frustration has gone?

Ah, you probably needed those tears, see them as healing. You are getting through it and if you are remembering the good as well as the bad times that's healthier.

Thanks ❤️. DS coming down for dinner shortly so just need to pull myself together for the moment. I might treat myself to a wee moment when he heads out to work later...

Ah @BigBoysDontCry, as soon as I read the thread title I knew it would be that song. I felt the same as you 16 years ago when it came on in the car.

It's such early days for you but I promise This Will Pass. In the meantime have your maudlin moments and cry it out.

Thank you, it's just a shock when it hits you from nowhere 🤗. I just need to get some boogie songs on instead. In the meantime DS and I will sling something funny on the TV while we are having dinner.

Hope you are doing well now. Xx

Probably doesn't help that it's been peeing down all day.

That song is a tear jerker for me too. The title is under the first wedding photo in the album when I married my 1st DH.

We both loved the Carpenters.
Sadly we split after 10 years. I remarried but was widowed after 13 years.

I became close friends with DH1 after DH2 died and we remained friends until he too died in 2021.
If I hear We've Only Just Begun now I am a mess.

Oh I feel for you! I was just getting over my failed marriage (he left, unexpectedly and very unkindly just before our third wedding anniversary) when Pink's 'Who Knew' came on in a shop.

I had to go and stand outside and blub quietly into a pasty. It gets better. Truly.

Thanks folks. Music does it every time. Onwards and upwards ❤️

Cry when you need to Op & keep moving forward. Music really does have a way of bringing out all the feels!

(There was a great thread on here a while ago with female empowerment songs - might be worth taking a look if you're wanting to listen to those kinds of songs.)

@Vroomfondleswaistcoat

I blubbed quietly into my pasty
Wondering when you had turned so damn nasty
If I'd known you'd become such a twat
I'd never have committed to that
But now my new life and I'm free
Learning what it means for me to be me
One day I may love once again
But for now 'Oh for fucks sake, men!'

Hope this is okay? Sometimes I get these little poems from nowhere. Who knew pasties could be so inspiring?

Love to you all ❤

Are you feeling any better now @BigBoysDontCry ?

I've been feeling similar for the last few days. I think the initial euphoria of getting him out of the house has worn off and now the sadness of what could have been has hit.

I'm doing fine I think, just staying away from the sad music. It's exactly as you say. I know I'm better off out of the situation but maybe about 10 years ago it might have been salvageable. He did at one point suggest counselling and I wasn't for it. Maybe that would have helped.

Anyway. We are where we are and overall I'm happier in myself but a bit sad for for what we could have had.

Onwards and upwards though 💪. Hope you feel better soon too.

I would add that he was in my dream last night... still being an annoying fucker. 😂🙄

🤣 at least I'm not dreaming of mine!

I'm feeling a bit better now, I just walked the dogs with my oldest friend and told her how I feel. We discussed it and it's helped me to see this is a completely normal feeling, which will, in time, pass.

I think it helped that the sun finally came out while we were walking and we also talked about things we could do together in the autumn.