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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Wanting to leave my husband

1 reply

Erinsmumuk · 12/08/2024 15:24

Hello all,
Sorry if this is a bit of an essay, I'll keep the details brief.
My home situation is a little complicated; my mum lives with us in a granny annexe (the only room we share is the kitchen) and we have a 18 month old. Our house needs work doing to it due to damp coming though the chimney we share with nextdoor. We live in a conservation area so removing the chimney isn't an option (we've checked). The chimney was repointed etc last week, so I really hope this solves the issue because if it doesn't it means yet more work and money trying to rectify it. Once of the bedrooms also needs replastering. All of which we don't have the money to do immediately, but hopefully I can spur this along between now and Christmas.
Until this work is resolved I don't want to call it a day because I'm worried I'll lose a lot of money on the house, and the large majority of the money invested is from my inheritance when my dad died, before I got married. I know I'll ultimately walk away with a lot less than I came into this with, but I'm trying to limit the damage.
The thing is, I'm finding it increasingly difficult to bite my tongue. My husband isn't a bad dad, but his best friend (who is a selfish so and so, has no kids, lives with his mum and wears his self-centredness like a badge of honour) and golf are definitely his priority (again keeping the details high level) without my mum having been here to pick up the slake I genuinely don't know how I would have coped. My husband and I don't argue anymore as I've lost the will that bringing it up will make the slightest bit of difference, but we did argue this morning and my blood is absolutely boiling! I know we will go weeks now with basic transactional conversation, and while I'm past caring I really hate the environment I'm subjecting our child and my mum too.
I'm due to start seeing a counsellor thought work, but I literally don't know how to make it through without me absolutely exploding into a irreparable rage!
Please help!

OP posts:
BookArt · 13/08/2024 07:51

What's more important?

Once the chimney is sorted, and the plastering is done what will be the next excuse?

For your sanity start making a get out plan. Where will you live? Copies of important documents, etc. Speak to a solicitor. Look at potential benefits to understand your finances. Maybe getting the ball running behind the scenes will help your sanity. But then at the same time you child and mum have to deal with that atmosphere.

Once you have facts it might help you make the jump. Good luck

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