Lost my job during divorce.

[planAplanB]

We've applied for divorce and it's going ahead. I've unexpectedly lost my job and now have a zero hours job to make a small amount of income whilst I try to get a full time position (prob won't get more than £20k pa because we have no childcare so I have to do the school run).
We were planning to our house on the market in the next month as we are still living together and it's just so tough to be under the same roof.
Has me losing my job massively affected what will happen in the divorce and how will I manage to afford somewhere to live? Terraced 3-bed in my area near kids school is £380k.
I feel totally trapped. He earns around £60k and pays all the bills, which of course he loved reminding me about.

Why does your earning potential have to suffer with doing the childcare and runs?

They are his DC too OP.

Because if he can't hold down his big full time job, he won't be able to pay our mortgage and all our bills.

Have a look at a benefits calculator to see what (if anything) you can claim.
But I'm not sure your plan of working very part time around school runs is realistic as a single parent.
I'm a lone parent and my daughter has to attend breakfast and after school clubs and holiday clubs so I can work 4.5 days a week. It's tough and not what I wanted but here we are. If that didn't exist I would have to find a childminder and if that didn't exist I would have to move her to a school that had wraparound provision, I just wouldn't have a choice.

I'm going to have to move my children to a different school, I think that's what it will come down to as there are just no breakfast club places available. My eldest is just about to start year 6 though so the timing is awful. I just don't know Ito do for the best.

If he does half the drop offs can you then get a better job?

How much collateral and savings do you have in your current house to be split? On £60k it is unlikely that he will have to pay you any more than the CMS minimum.

I can’t see how either of you can afford to buy in your current area. How much were you earning before you got made redundant? You need to maximise your earnings even if that means using childminders/ breakfast clubs. Divorcing means that you will both have to make huge cuts in your expectations about accommodation and standard of living. Best to accept that now and plan accordingly.

You're selling your house. He'll have his mortgage to pay for and you will your own.

Moving forward you need to place your own financial security first - not his. You are both parents and his larger pay packet does not make him exempt from childcare or mean you having to earn a smaller salary so he can maintain his.

Thanks for all your comments. After being together for over 20 years, it's so hard to chance my mindset. He was always the bigger earner so childcare always fell to me. I've just applied for a job where I would not be able to do the school run for 3 days a week. He'll just have to take kids to school on those days. He works from home too. I need to stay strong and remember that I have the right to go to work. I

Good Lord, if he WFH he can definitely do it!

It's really hard to change your mindset OP but you will get there.

My EXDH was the higher earner (by far) and I started working FT earning half his salary. I now earn more than him and am so glad I put in the hard graft and placed my salary as important as his.

Working and getting on the career ladder meant I could soar like a phoenix, independently - he wanted me in the gutter. It feels amazing.

It’s unlikely to change your settlement as that will be based on your prior full time earnings and your earning capacity

it will likely impact your ability to get a mortgage

your husband will need to step up