Mediation - lack of financial disclosure

[Catsruledogsdroolokay]

We have had several mediation sessions
Two to discuss child arrangements and two to discuss finances
The mediator has not been great and there was some confusion over when documentation to support the financial disclosure should be shared so a month after we first shared account balances etc my husband finally shared documentation but is was incomplete

I have asked him to provide the documents but he is ignoring me
The mediation company says they can’t get involved

What happens now?
I don’t want all our hard work and money to have gone to waste!
Do I just back down?
How can I keep things moving forward?

You will have to take him to court

How close are you to agreeing? What are you stuck on

Which evidence has he failed to provide

Have you both done Form E?

Inconsistent bank statements - he’s given 3 months for two accounts, one month for 3rd account, nothing for 4th account
No documentation on loan given to family member to qualify amount withstanding

We agreed in mediation 12 months worth of statements and proof of amounts given and received for loan

I am very frustrated

We did not do Form E (he refused) so used the mediators forms

So

if you insist on this to progress you will need to go legal route and possibly end up in court

That could take a long time and be very expensive . It may be the way you need to go or may not.

so I’d be asking myself

do I generally have a handle on our joint assets/ know what there is/ know both incomes etc. if yes, are we materially disconnected on a settlement outcome ?

if the answer is yes on first and no on the second I’d probably proceed without full disclosure and form e etc.

if answer to both is no to first and yes to the second ( ie you don’t know what there is at all and he’s proposing to keep 90% of assets and yours is a more balanced proposal) then weigh up the £ and decide if worth pursuing.

there is no point spending £20k on fees ( and mental anguish and stress) to be awarded 10k more. You could if course be a litigant in person to save fees but this will cost you time and energy

what are you hoping bank statements will prove? I’d be more interested in

equity position
pensions valuations
values if any other investments /savings etc
debts outstanding
if you have good idea on these I’m not sure what bank statements provide tbh ( I didn’t bother with them )

Have you both made settlement proposals?
what are you disconnected on?

The advice around proportionality of requests and the need for information is solid. A lot of people post vague information on here and it’s impossible to gauge how much they are talking about and whether it is worth following up using solicitors and accountants.

For many couples disclosure doesn’t tell them anything they didn’t already know. They don’t need 12 months of bank statements etc.

Your post however has some red flags in it that might mean you do have to press this issue. For example, 4 bank accounts is a lot. But not if they are savings accounts that don’t really change or have regular amounts going in and nothing going out. The loan to a relative is again a bit worrying in terms of how he manages his affairs. But it could be a few hundred quid or 50k.

online banking means most of us can draw off statements really quickly. But that produces a lot of information that maybe does or doesn’t require a lot of analysis and then might tell us nothing.

The big question is what are you looking for in all this information? Then is that relevant to any settlement or material to any settlement.

As others have said the mediation only works if both parties cooperate, so sadly, unless he does, then it’s court. The other thing the court does do is put in legal timeframes. What people say they’ll do and what they actually do can mean things drag on and on 😞