I don’t want a divorce please help

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I’m devastated! He said he has no feelings for me he doesn’t love me he can’t stand me! My head is an absolute mess! I’ve cried lots over this his lacks of feelings for me! I’m grieving he was my first love I want the pain to stop! I had said loads over the past months about saving the marriage! I’m terrified of divorce!

he blames me for everything friends and family say split up. I’m in shock I feel so traumatised I can’t live without him but can’t live with him blaming me for saying my feelings. He doesn’t touch me why is this so traumatic? We have a mortgage waste of time. I can’t deal with this, I feel worthless dehumanised ripped apart by him. I don’t know if I love him thought I did. This is unbareable why does he hate me so much? I’m a nice person all I did was try to work things out with him he had a go at me for phoning helplines. How do I emotionally detach from him?

You’ve posted about him before and described the relationship as abusive. You need to get free.

This is horribly painful but you can do it. Take some power into your own hands. It's awful feeling you are at his mercy but if you call the divorce because of his cruelty you won't feel so helpless. See a solicitor and see what steps to take. Don't let him call the shots. If you look around you will see other women who have come through this and survived and started a new life. It's not good for your own self respect and confidence to hear this man being so brutal so come on now you can do this and you will come through it.
Make an appointment with a solicitor today and take it from there. You will get support here and you will look back and think..l did it. It's not losing this man that is causing so much pain as he sounds awful : it's the fear of abandonment which can be very strong and very painful.
You will have better days ahead..l can guarantee it.

It is an incredibly difficult thing to go through OP but once you are out the other side you will feel so much better.

If it was me I’d set aside emotion as much as possible for now and just deal with the practical bits. See a solicitor as a starting point and go from there. Good luck!

I am sure you are a nice person.

You are a nice person who is being treated badly.

He is your first love - you have nothing to compare this with. There are better people out there.

Do not fear divorce. It is your chance for freedom and to find the person you deserve.

OP you've posted several times about this abusive man.

You have poor mental health and he uses it against you.

He threatens to take your daughter away from you.

He punches holes in the walls.

One time, he even moved another woman into your house when you were sectioned.

It would be better to split up, honestly.

I'm sorry you're feeling so bad.