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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Divorce - playing games?

2 replies

Twogorgeousgirls7 · 30/07/2024 13:57

I left my stb ex-husband at the end of 2022. After a period of intense emotional recovery I initiated divorce proceedings last summer. After 8+ months of waiting for his financial statement my solicitor advised we’d need to now go through the courts, with the first financial hearing at the end of September. I’m in a huge amount of debt as renting for myself and eldest dd whilst youngest dd has opted to stay with her dad which breaks my heart but is for another post.

I’ve got legal aid (which helps and you all know why I’ve got it) but I’ve just been told that his solicitors have advised they’re not instructed by him anymore and he’s now got a new solicitor. I don’t know if this will slow things up even more?

he also took a voluntary redundancy last year and has now gone from a very good salary to a self employed £10 an hour type thing which is obviously going to make his earnings potential look completely different.

he's currently sat in the family home that has no outstanding mortgage and hasn’t paid a single penny towards supporting us. There is enough to sell the family home and buy (or very nearly) two smaller three bed houses so that each of us can provide a home for our kids.

so my questions are:
1: with his earning capacity markedly lower than it’s ever been, will his previous salaries be taken into account?

2: with his new solicitor being appointed will this slow things up - and why would he have changed?

3: am I likely to receive half of the house value (even though only in his name)

4: should I be asking for part of his pension? (I didn’t work for nearly 7 years as stayed home with the kids, but obviously had no pension contributions then)

5: do I declare on the form E that he lost his driving license by drink driving or does that just sound spiteful?

6: can I include our eldest dd hopefully going to uni next year and the associated potential costs with that as well as any consideration towards a car and insurance if she passes he driving test towards the end of the year

7: for the future needs how do I determine what kind of property I’d base my costs on? Just a standard three bed in the local area or the cheapest smallest place or the more nicer place? Standard feels like the fair thing to do?

8: if the pension (or part) is included would I ask for a sharing order or offset?

so many questions, hopefully some of you might have some experience you can share.

OP posts:
millymollymoomoo · 30/07/2024 14:46

1- yes his earning potential will be considered and he’d be assessed on that

2- possibly

3- you’ll receive a fair share which could be 50% or more or less depending on multiple factors - housing yourself abc chikdren will be priority

4- yrs his pension should be assed as part of the total pit / you can then decide to to pso or try to trade for more equity

5 not relevant

6 unlikely that will be considered but you can request it

7 an average 3 bed in your area

8 up to you once you know the values and comparable liquid asset equivalent

millymollymoomoo · 30/07/2024 14:47

Sorry for spelling!

4 yes his pensions should be assessed as part of the pot

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