Mat leave /mortgage /kids

[Splitupnow]

Hi
Need advice please
Currently on mat leave but not able to go back to my job as we moved house and I'm 100 miles from my old job. No qualifications, always worked in sales roles.
Have 3 kids. Large mortgage which is due to increase next year when we need to renew. Obviously only just bought this house and in the process of renovating it.
Now we need to separate and the situation has become toxic and not good for the kids.
Soon to be ex is earning well in a full time role.
What are our options in terms of the house, the kids, etc?
I am going to struggle to work/earn enough to pay everything and be able to cover childcare for the babies, I just can't see how it's possible or how I can go back to work with kids these ages.

Are you married?

Sorry to hear you're having such a hard time.

Ouch sounds tough. Can he afford childcare for the kids?

Yes we are married.

Thank you, it's the right decision but it's scary as everything is so expensive and I'd planned to go back to work when the babies were a little older as it doesn't make sense with the earnings vs childcare costs.

His salary currently covers everything but there is no extra for childcare and an estimated cma calculation wouldn't even touch the sides of the childcare let alone the mortgage.

you’re options are

find a selling role where you can navigate hours and earn good commission

claim up to 85% childcare costs if possible
claim cms ( although if he’s paying all mortgage and bills he might cease if he has large cms too)
look at universal credit claim

ultimately unless your dh is very high earner you’ll be unlikely to get spousal and you’ve already said there’s not much money left over after everything is paid so his ability to pay any sounds limited.

so you’ll need to look possibly to sell and split any equity and possibly rent if unable to get a mortgage. It’s unlikely he’d have to pay the mortgage and bills on the current house for you while also having to pay somewhere else.

Will depend on how much he earns, what you’re earning potential is ( sales could be high) and what assets there are.

realiity is you’ll most likely need to work
how old are your children ?

@millymollymoomoo
Thank you this is helpful.
I hadn't thought of universal credit as this could cover me briefly until I can sort things plus council tax reduction etc
I think he'd be happy to keep paying the mortgage but as you say depends if he can find somewhere for himself as have to pay that too.
Kids are 4 and twins 4 months old so not ideal timing. Because we moved house I started mat leave early and only on stat so that's finishing in a few months too.
No assets and my earning potential could be good but unlikely on flexible/part time hours but I need to start making some approaches when the twins are old enough to go to childcare I think

How long would he be happy to pay the mortgage for? Where would he live ?

6-12 months perhaps reasonable
5 years perhaps not

i think you need to think hard about a return full time when they are a year old and figure out what that looks like in terms of

childcare
child arrangements? Ie when will your husband have them? Will it be eow/50:50/ something different?
sales careers can be high earning. what could you earn vs childcare fees plus any help you might get with those ? Etc

sit down and nap it all out and if possible discuss with your husband. What does he propose/think will happen?

the next few years with childcare fees is always going to be hard financially

how much does ex earn?