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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Original poster

Marriage break up

8 replies

pubertyalloveragain · 15/07/2024 15:34

Has anyone out there left a marriage owing to a lack of emotional connection, emotional intimacy and a lack of joy (chat and some laughter)?

OP posts:
beachdays4 · 15/07/2024 21:59

Yep, currently going through that now. It's sad thinking about what could have been, but I've come to the conclusion that if it's what your gut is telling you, it's the right thing no matter how scary that may be. How long have you been together? X

FatfunandADHD · 15/07/2024 22:00

Yes this is the main reason I left my marriage. I now have a new partner who makes me laugh every day and years later we can still chat until the early hours of the morning.

beachdays4 · 15/07/2024 22:28

FatfunandADHD · 15/07/2024 22:00

Yes this is the main reason I left my marriage. I now have a new partner who makes me laugh every day and years later we can still chat until the early hours of the morning.

Ahhhh sounds lush. Hoping for that one day 🤞 so pleased for you x

Original poster
pubertyalloveragain · 15/07/2024 23:24

beachdays4 · 15/07/2024 21:59

Yep, currently going through that now. It's sad thinking about what could have been, but I've come to the conclusion that if it's what your gut is telling you, it's the right thing no matter how scary that may be. How long have you been together? X

There for 11 years, married for 9.

OP posts:
Original poster
pubertyalloveragain · 15/07/2024 23:26

FatfunandADHD · 15/07/2024 22:00

Yes this is the main reason I left my marriage. I now have a new partner who makes me laugh every day and years later we can still chat until the early hours of the morning.

Amazing - so happy for you.

Why do I think for me this is impossible. How do I believe there is a future again? I am strung up feeling guilty and / or delusional or naive. Moments of hope and peace are fleeting right now - please share some wisdom, I know I cannot go back.

OP posts:
Original poster
pubertyalloveragain · 15/07/2024 23:27

beachdays4 · 15/07/2024 21:59

Yep, currently going through that now. It's sad thinking about what could have been, but I've come to the conclusion that if it's what your gut is telling you, it's the right thing no matter how scary that may be. How long have you been together? X

I've just jumped off the cliff - wandering around feeling good but also so shell-less at the same time.

OP posts:
greyfoxy · 15/07/2024 23:29

Yes I did the same. I don't have a new partner but I feel truly happy. No more treading on egg shells - no more worrying or feeling miserable.

beachdays4 · 16/07/2024 17:51

I felt like had jumped off a cliff too! Still do sometimes tbh! Happy but shell-less. To be honest the first week or so I felt like a zombie, just going through the day to day stuff to keep normal for the sake of the kids. I couldn't believe I'd actually done it. Husband returned a week later and it was hard, but strangely no tears from me which I took to be my instinct kicking in. several months on, we still live together whilst house is on the market, so still feel a bit zombie-like with few emotions. Maybe reality will kick in when the split actually happens. It's helped moving into separate rooms. We seem to be arguing less, but that's likely as there's a way forward now, but at times this can trap me into questioning whether it's the right thing or not. Having had years of wondering 'what if I'm brave enough' is all the validation I need. Someone who is truly happy just doesn't have those thoughts. I do take comfort in hearing others in similar situations though as Mumsnet has been a sanctuary for that x

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