Please help

[haveyouopenedyourbowelstoday]

DH and I are separating after 10 years of marriage. No dependants. Both mid 50's.
My inheritance paid for the house 9 years ago but there is also a £20k mortgage outstanding. House has approximately doubled in value. Neither can afford to buy the other out. His DM recently died and he will eventually get approx £40k from her estate.
My thinking is we sell, pay off mortgage. Keep individual pensions as they are likely to be similar. I take out what I put in then equally divide the difference. He keeps his mums money.
I'm told I'm being too fair.
What do you think would be a good settlement?

I'm definitely no money expert but as you've told it it sounds about right to me, and presumably this has been amicably agreed, which counts for a lot. If you were fighting you could both lose more in solicitor's fees than you'd gain anyway.
Who is telling you you're being too fair OP?

What is the legal status of the house?

Was it bought as joint owners or tenants in common? If joint owners then the legal standing would be 50:50

If tenants in common with your amount declared - was this also reflected in a pre nup?

If it's all reflected in a pre nup and the legal docs for the house - is it done as first X amount to you, the rest 50:50 or is it done as a percentage split?

If a percentage split - then fair includes the increase in value for you to reflect the fact you own more. If just a document that you own £X amount then the rest is shared - then that is all you would get legally

If on paper it is all half and half and not declared as you owning it. Then yes, suggest exactly what you have and hope he doesn't hit in asking for more

Your offer sounds reasonable

If your inheritance wasn’t ringfenced it won’t likely be handed back to you first before splitting. How sizeable was it?

in theory his inheritance could also be in the pot.

why do your friends think you’re being too fair ?? The house is a marital asset regardless of how it was paid.

you may, if it got to court, argue successfully for higher % but this will come down to both your needs, incomes rather than who paid what although if no dependents you may have more success in getting some if this back.

You can of course, put offers to him and agree between yourselves if you are able. If he agrees your suggestion job done.

does your plan allow for him to be housed? What overall share would he end up with ?

It’s a position. His is likely to be to offer 50% of the assets and he actually has the stronger argument to ring fence his inheritance as it has never been used in the pursuit of the marriage whilst yours has.

Your friends are entitled to their opinion but it is the legal reality that you will have to deal with. What they think has no standing. What a solicitor tells him will have standing in court.

its not a short marriage and you are both middle aged. If you lived together before the marriage then it will be taken into account.

Expect a straightforward 50:50 split and be prepared to write off your inheritance if your didn’t take steps to protect it. By being prepared take advice from people who are qualified to give it.