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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Original poster

Your expertise please

6 replies

Peppersalty · 02/07/2024 20:36

Hi all,

unfortunately my marriage broke down and it’s been a rough few years, divorce is now going through and me and my little one have had to move to my mothers home as staying in the house with him was just not doable due to dv.
our eldest child (19) stays with him at home due to no space at my moms me and the youngest (8) have been sharing a bed since December!
he is using the fact that the eldest stays at home against me when it is known that as soon as I have suitable housing they will of course live back with me.
does anyone know if this is going to cause an issue with me getting my home back at all? He is the owner of the home I’m not on the mortgage.
many thanks

OP posts:
FatfunandADHD · 02/07/2024 20:39

It doesn't matter who owns the home on paper if you were married (some caveats around very short marriages etc)

It's possible the house will need to be sold and equity split to allow you both the opportunity to have a place of your own. Unless you can buy him out of the home with an upfront lump payment (from a mortgage or loan) etc.

Original poster
Peppersalty · 02/07/2024 20:42

FatfunandADHD · 02/07/2024 20:39

It doesn't matter who owns the home on paper if you were married (some caveats around very short marriages etc)

It's possible the house will need to be sold and equity split to allow you both the opportunity to have a place of your own. Unless you can buy him out of the home with an upfront lump payment (from a mortgage or loan) etc.

Thank you
there are 4 properties in the pot so hopefully all will be ok

OP posts:
FatfunandADHD · 02/07/2024 20:43

Yes then I'd suggest you keep negotiations with the home you want to keep in mind.

Who is handling your financial negotiations as there is DV is it all going through solicitors?

Original poster
Peppersalty · 02/07/2024 20:45

FatfunandADHD · 02/07/2024 20:43

Yes then I'd suggest you keep negotiations with the home you want to keep in mind.

Who is handling your financial negotiations as there is DV is it all going through solicitors?

Hiya
yes all going through solicitor
I did go for non molestation and occupation order but they wouldn’t give it without him being present and I was going through chemotherapy and just not strong enough to do it at that time

thank you

OP posts:
FatfunandADHD · 02/07/2024 20:51

Don't let him get inside your head. I might be wrong but at the age of 19 I'm not sure their needs are dealt with in the same way as your younger child so the threat he is using is very very weak. It sounds like you both need to ideally come out with enough money of physically a three bed home and the more there is in the pot for this the easier it should be.

Don't let him get inside your head. Stay calm.

Original poster
Peppersalty · 02/07/2024 20:54

FatfunandADHD · 02/07/2024 20:51

Don't let him get inside your head. I might be wrong but at the age of 19 I'm not sure their needs are dealt with in the same way as your younger child so the threat he is using is very very weak. It sounds like you both need to ideally come out with enough money of physically a three bed home and the more there is in the pot for this the easier it should be.

Don't let him get inside your head. Stay calm.

Thank you so much and I know that’s what he’s trying to do. He’s been screaming at me last week about how because I didn’t pay the mortgage or paint the house I have no entitlement to it 😩 which I know isn’t correct.
im just worn out with it all.

OP posts:
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