How to actually start

[thirtyseven37]

Should my STBExH and I sit down together to fill in the D8 form? We don't currently have a plan on how to split the assets as we don't agree. He wants 50:50 but I can't manage on that split.
We don't have a plan for the kids as not discussed it yet. I'm in the middle of changing jobs so don't know what my salary will be.
Can I still instruct a solicitor to help me if we do the D8 form ourselves?
Should I just get a solicitor to do it all for me as I don't understand the wording?

Talk to a solicitor. Don't let him railroad you in to filling in any forms until you've spoken to someone. My stbxh wanted 50:50 too and wasn't happy when I said no. There's no way we'd come up with an agreement without input from elsewhere

Thank you. I have had my free 30min appointment. When you say talk to a solicitor, do you mean that you have to have the proposed split in place and agreed before you fill in the D8?

imho, you need to figure out how the kids' needs will be met WELL and then the split %s will be obvious and simpler to agree.

Are you trying to stay home owner or could you afford to rent?

What have you offered him instead of 50/50? How much exactly are you arguing about

I haven't offered anything in return. I need enough of the money from house sale to put down a massive deposit on a house as I only earn £15k per annum so won't get much of a mortgage. I'm looking to improve this in the autumn.
Do we figure all this out before applying for the divorce then?
The solicitor I spoke to said to get the divorce started as it takes so long.

What does he earn
what assets are there?
a court wouldn’t necessarily consider a home purchase a necessary outcone
Your housing needs are the sane so if you took most of equity can your husband also afford to purchase a house suitable ?
Are there other assets? Pensions?

Yes you may as well get the ball rolling, if you're sure, e.g. by doing an online divorce form.
Divorce is 3 bits -- form filling about the legal end of the marriage; where children live/stay; how any money is divided. They all need to be sorted out, but the in-built time delays mean you should get started even if you don't currently have answers to the second and third bits.

Start by going to see a mortgage adviser and finding out how much you can borrow. You can't really go forwards without this information.

Sadly buying a house post divorce is not a given. You will have to be prepared to rent. Furnish yourself with all the facts and figures of all your finances and take some proper advice from a qualified specialist solicitor.

You all need somewhere safe to live. That could be rented accommodation for all.

Lots of questions first - are you sharing looking after the children 50/50? How old are the kids? Do you both need a two or three bed house as you both need somewhere the children can stay? What does he earn? Can he afford to rent or buy if he doesn’t have 50%? In the Autumn will your earnings increase? what equity is there in the house? Can you maximise your earnings any more - eg working more hours/claiming additional benefits etc?
Maybe start the divorce but look to sort the financial order/housing etc once you’ve changed jobs and know a more fixed salary? Otherwise whatever you agree may need changing anyway in just a few months - a divorce will take much longer than this.
You need to look at what you’re both earning once benefits, Child Maintenance etc have been included / deducted from earnings, look at all the other assets, pensions etc and then you can make a more informed agreement on a fair split - which allows you both to rent or buy something to house you and the children, with both parents. It may be that your exes request for 50/50 is fair if his income ends up being similar and you’re both having the kids overnight. Depends on many factors. Like other posters have said, accommodation includes rental accommodation and the expectation is that both parties are housed with the available money. Both of you need to know whether you can borrow enough to buy, once you’ve changed jobs and looked into Universal Credit etc.

You can start to fill in a form E so all the info is in one place to bring to a discussion, but no point in filling out a D81 until you’ve decided how the children are going to be looked after and what your earnings will be later in the year. Maybe you should start by sorting out if you’re having the children 50/50, if not, who is paying child maintenance and how much, if applicable, and go from there.