Any lawyers: advice in court

[BlackStrayCat]

Just that really. I finally have a court date for an incredibly contentious divorce. STBXH has behaved beyond appallingly. To the DC (not just me).

I have legal aid he has a very expensive lawyer.

Any general tips for what to wear/expect/how to act would be highly, highly appreciated.

Can I ask for a screen for the oldest DC who is a witness?

Many, many thanks anyone who has been through this or is a lawyer, @millymollymoo ? My lawyer is fine but slightly blase about it all.

Hi if you want a screen your solicitor needs to contact the Court in advance to request a reasonable adjustment giving reasons for the request. The judge hearing the case will then approve or deny the request- usually reasonable requests are allowed.

@ragdoll12345 that is a very timely and kind reply thank you.

I will be requesting one then, on Monday (one weeks notice)

First off, try to keep your emotions in check in court, especially since it sounds like things are pretty tense. Judges appreciate calm, respectful behavior. As for your clothing, aim for something simple but professional—no need to go overboard, just clean and neat. I’d also recommend asking your lawyer about the screen for your DC; it sounds like a reasonable request given the circumstances, especially for the kids’ sake. And, if you’re feeling the pressure of his fancy lawyer, remember, not all criminal lawyers or high-profile attorneys can overshadow a clear and strong case, so trust your team. When I was in a similar situation, I was surprised how much the court did to accommodate vulnerable witnesses.

I have no experience but I’m giving advice from my brother’s experience in court.
He was fighting for custody for his daughter.
His daughter’s mother was nothing short of a psychotic narcissist, but a clever one.
My brother is ex-military.
His daughter wanted to spend most of her time at his house.
The mother was very calm, clever, played the victim.
My brother was emotional, frustrated that they were falling for her victim crap.
Ultimately they saw him as a hothead soldier with a temper and they saw the Mum as a lost little lamb.
He had voicemail recordings, texts, emails, witnesses all proving her real character and the judge wanted nothing to do with it, he sided with the mother. It took 8 years for him to finally get custody, his daughter is now completely withdrawn and going through counselling as she was isolated from all family on both sides by the mother.

So my advice would be to stay calm, don’t be emotional, don’t show your frustration, be as professional as possible.

Thankyou both. Judge ordered a child psychologist.
I got 100% custody and (crappy but adequate settlement) through mediation. (Which I was not present for - domestic abuse)
Been 6 months now and life has totally turned rond for the better!

@xRobin your poor, poor brother. This is what xh tried to do to me.

I’ve only just noticed the date! Apologies if I’ve dragged up bad feelings for you OP!
I’m so so glad life is turning around for you, what an amazing update!
How are your child/ren now?

She used to say she’d either see him dead (through suicide) or in prison. She had a non-mol order against him, but then turned up to my Dad’s house (where he lived at the time) on Father’s Day so my brother’s daughter could give “Grandad a Father’s Day card” and then called the Police when my brother walked out the house (she knew he lived there, he always had).
Would you believe now she has a boyfriend she needs the time away from her DD and willingly lets my brother have his daughter now? Oh… and her dog! She also gives him her dog (not my brother’s dog at all) overnight so she can have a night off.

Some people are just horrid and I think your xH and my brother’s ex will both end up in a hot, fiery pit of doom one day!