Sick to death of stbx- putting house up for sale/ can i block him

[whatamess100]

I posted the other week, he refused to give his consent to sell, told me to take him to court. Changed his mind, now hes up for selling but the estate agent sent paper work 1 week ago for him to sign, guess who's not signed it. I sent a polite txt to ask him to sign paper work as im stuggling to pay mortgage and i got a shitty txt saying he needs speak to the estate agent as he will refuse any offer and will only sell if he gets full asking price. He also had a dig about how i can afford the mortgage because im moving in with my partner. He's clearly jealous of death, why else mention me moving in with my partner.

I nearly replied with a hefty stright to the point txt but i just didn't bother instead i spoke to the estate agent who said she will try her best and deal with him.

He's so narcissistic and toxic him and the ow are just awful, i get abuse off her too via a friend she since blocked her.

We have 1 dc. He does 99% of his communicating with him hes only 7 and that annoys me but it is what it is. Would it be wrong if i blocked him and then unblocked him on the day he has my dc? Then block again. Im just worried if anything happens and he cant get hold of me so block/ unbloack seems like my only option.

Any suggestions welcome

Yeah you need to calm down and stop reacting to him

Him sending messages through a 7 year old is not on send out a communication app request tell him you will be no longer taking messages from you 7 year old as you don't think it's in their best interests

Also have you been to court over financials yet?

I didn't know there was an app. Can you send me the detials please as i agree, it's not ok, but he will not communicate some times, then others. He's like a nut job.

No finacials yet, im currently doing the divorce online but i need advice on the finacial order part as i had planned to do that part through a solictor because hes trying to back me in a corter to accept 5050 or not put it up for sale last week but as part of the gov divorce it asked abot a financial order and i have no idea what to put so i need advice.

I didn't reply i learned a long time ago he LOVES a reaction

Can you bluff and say don't worry about it new partners going to move in now we're expecting

Bet he signs it super fast

Total cunt

he won't let me move on and get the house gone no matter what, ive git a do and new baby and he still clinging into me. He just acts like im the one who had an affair and ruined his life not the other way round.

I can't afford to force the sale, we have only about 50k equity and thats if we get full asking price...we won't, we brought it as a doer upper and the jobs didnt get done as i had no money.

He's an odd ball, he couldn't give a rats ass about seeing DC hes had him one night, in 10 months. Other than that he just has dc 6hrs once a week, he has no contact with the school, doesn't go to parents evening or school plays, doesn't offer to pay for after school activies,nothing!

Ive just looked at the parenting app and i dont think it would work as he doesn't care about his appointments, he had a emergancy visit to A&E with a potential operation and he didn't even reply till the next day asking if he was ok, in that time he may well have had to have the operation and a stay in hospital and he didn't care. I could just do with one where you message, ive asked him time and time again stop communicating through my son but he still does it.

I'd like block and unblock, i dont know whats stopping me really.

You need to hire a solicitor.

Pay whatever it takes to make him cooperate. You won't regret spending the money.

A solicitor can apply for a court order to comply with the sale process. He will be obliged to cooperate or face consequences (i.e. contempt of court).

A solicitor will also press forward with an agreed visitation schedule. Again, he will have to comply or face the court to explain himself. Or ask yourself if you and your child would be better off without this man messing up your lives?

Please get a solicitor even if you decide visitation wouldn't be in the child's best interests.

All you'll get from trying to deal with a man like this on your own through the divorce process is an ulcer. You'll also end up giving in to his financial bullying just to put an end to the aggravation.

You may be able to recover costs if he keeps on stalling, refusing to respond, putting up spurious arguments against division of the assets, making unreasonable claims, etc.

You say he has a girlfriend who harasses you too? I would ask her to help. ‘Sheila sorry to bother you but I am keen to get the divorce finalised. Please can you ask Derek to return the paperwork’. Or at drop off in front of her ‘oh Derek please can you return the form so we can speed up the divorce, I’ve returned my bits already’. Bet he’s telling her you are the delay!

If you cannot do that then Maybe start by saying to the mutual friend ‘I am worried about Derek, he’s still really struggling with us breaking up, I really hope he seeks help from a counselling service so he can move on, he’s finding it hard to sign and let go’.

His girlfriend is likely to be the one who pushes him especially if she hates you.

Then you need to grey rock him. If he texts DO NOT respond for 24 hours. Then get a sensible /calm friend to rewrite your message.

If you fall into arrears then in a worse case scenario then you will lose the house to the mortgage company and BOTH of you will end up with nothing to show for years of home ownership. You also BOTH end up with a knackered credit score which will fuck up BOTH of your abilities to borrow money in future.

Remind him of this.

I'm following this as I am in a similar situation at the moment.

Could I just ask, will the fact that you've moved in with/or are going to be moving in with your new partner affect the final financial settlement in court?

How is he communicating via your 7 year old?

I would go to court to force the sale now anyway. He has and he will delay and if you do it now it will be over sooner. Just ignore him as much as possible. Text him any info he needs re legal matters and ds but that's it, no reaction to any bs just push things though behind his back and remove this splinter from your life one part at a time.

The app is called talking parents and I believe it's contents can be used in court

Can you switch your mortgage to interest only?

Ds has is own fone for twice weekly calls, he will plan is pick up times with him when ds has no clue whats going on with plans or its , tell mum this, tell mum that

I don’t think it’s a good idea for your ds to have his own phone. Although I suppose whatever phone is being used it will be hard to control your ex making arrangements with ds.

your poor ds 😞 I hope he doesn’t feel stuck in the middle. It’s sad his dad can’t put his best interests first.

You need to supervise this phone use and phone. He tries to start making plans you hang up.