Ex wants to buy me out of house

[cupcakegirl22]

I’m currently going through divorce proceedings with my ex. We have a joint mortgage that is in both of our names and are currently still legally married. My ex told me his plan is to buy me out, is he able to do this without my consent?

He has been emotionally and verbally abusive to me for most of our marriage and has never really contributed to our 2 young children. I know it sounds bitter, but I don’t want him to keep the marital home when we move out. When we finalise everything is this something that he can do if he can get approved for mortgage etc?

It’s generally beneficial to be bought out. It reduces costs and you don’t have to wait for a buyer to offer the right price.

why don’t you want him to live there. You won’t be sharing the home with him and will have your life.

You have a choice. One of you buys the other out, or you sell it (and incur large fees). Personally I would rather keep the extra cash and let him buy me out so I can start a fresh new life somewhere without bad memories.

He can't force you without agreement but he can make an application to court where a judge can force you to sell. He could also ask the judge to make you pay the court costs. Either way you will lose.

Are you in a position to buy him out yourself? You can probably stall things by being difficult but he can take you to court and a judge will order you to sell to him.
I understand you're disappointed that he might get to keep his old life but in the longer tern, it gets you your share faster and saves money on real estate and solicitors fees which will be in the thousands by selling to a third party. Half of which will come out of your share.

Finally I'm afraid it's par for the course these days for both partners to claim the other was verbally and emotionally abusive during the marriage . It doesn't change the legal entitlements of either even if it can be proven to be true.

He cannot do it without your consent if you are on the mortgage and deeds but if you agree and teh bank agree he can afford it then why not? The kids would still have the stability of knowing the house the go to to see dad and you would get some equity if available into your hand.

I think personally it would be great to be bought out if all legal and at an agreed financial amount. Fresh start for you with the emotional ties of an emotional ex and not having to wait for a sale with an ex who does not help. You and your DC will get a fresh start that he has never stepped a foot in!!

It depends if you can buy him out or not. Is it a case of if I can't live there neither should you, in which case you don't really have a strong argument, or is he disadvantaging you in any way financially by buying you out.

Generally speaking, it's cheaper overall if one person buys the other out.

If he buys you out, you save on your estate agent and sale costs, which is more money in your pocket. Get three quotes from reputable EA and take an average of them so you know the appropriate ballpark.

Take the money and run

My ex bought me out of the house and I was so happy about it. It enabled me to buy a lovely new place for a fresh start, with none of the memories from my marriage lingering in the place that I lived. I don't know why you don't bite his hand off.

My ex is buying me out of our marital home.

We got three valuations before form E. I put down the exact midpoint. He of course put down the lowest. He is also allowed to deduct cost of sales, further devaluing the house.

We don’t have a mortgage on it though.

Would you not prefer a fresh start in a home not filled with bad memories?

Did you decide what to do @cupcakegirl22?

Just found this thread as I am in a similar position. I’m curious about all the advice to let the ex buy you out. My worry (for my situation) is that if he stays and I go, our child will always think this is his home so then will not like being with me at my new place.

I see that it’s a fresh start for me but will a child see if that way?