Hi all,
Long story short, my marriage of 20yrs is over. We're early 40s. We've grown apart. No other parties involved. I'm just done. We have 3 kids under 5. He is a great father (for the most part), hard worker and helps around the house. However, I can no longer deal with his angry outbursts when he's had a few drinks. He throws stuff, breaks stuff, calls me all the names under the sun. All in front of the kids. Next day there's no apology. I have to point out his inappropriate behaviours in order for him to acknowledge them! This happens most weeks.
Last night I tried to avoid an argument by taking myself and kids into another room so he could watch the rugby. Only after it had finished he had a go at me about the very thing I tried to avoid. He literally rowed with me over a situation that didn't even occur!!
He won't discuss or acknowledge I no longer want to continue in this relationship. Therefore making plans to separate is impossible.
I have no qualms about moving out with the kids. I don't care about having to start again. In a way I wouldn't want to stay in the family home as I think he'd chuck it back in my face.
Neither of us have anywhere to go/people to stay with whilst we try and sort anything.
We sleep in separate beds - mainly due to his snoring and this has just continued. I don't miss him in my bed. There's no sex or affection. I struggle to see why he even wants to be in a relationship with me.
I've considered counselling, but I'm past the point. Plus it will be me forking out for it.
Financially: I earn more money. I think I could support myself and kids although it would be tight.
He would prob squander his money instead of reinvesting.
Estimating my house price approx 290k . Have 73k left to pay on joint mortgage.
I just don't know where to start. Please help!