Silent treatment and divorce

[szi123]

Starting divorce proceedings, first meeting with lawyer next week. 30 years of almost back to back silent treatment from husband (all other abuse that goes with narcissist behaviour)

Assets and children will be 50/50. Living in same house which needs to be sold. He has agreed to a divorce but not taken any steps to proceed for last one year. Zero communication between us, unless I initiate but then he goes back to silent treatment straight away.

Is this going to cost me a lot as all communication will presumably via my lawyer .
He has never in 30years ever broken his silence unless I plead first so don’t think this will change now (the
silence not the pleading).

A lawyer is just going to send him letters. There may come a time when you need to use a lawyer but don’t waste money until you need to. Write to him. Just because he doesn’t verbalise a reply doesn’t mean he can’t read and comprehend. Just try the communication 2 times and then a final one assuming his consent to whatever you are asking for.

It’s perfectly possible to divorce someone and never have a verbal conversation. You can still do a lot yourself and only use a solicitor when you need to.

I agree with the other commenter, you can definitely get through your divorce without needing to verbally communicate with them. Solicitors charge crazy fees so only use them when you really need to. In case it can help you save a little money too, see if this help guide can help you as its about dividing assets. Then you can decide and do what you want to do yourself and then only ask the solicitor for help when you need it, if you do. A solicitor was too expensive for me so I used this. https://iamlip.com/help-guides/the-court-process-of-dividing-your-marital-assets-finances-and-pensions/

Please take care of yourself as much as you can, 30 years of dealing with that behaviour is not easy and you don't deserve to have to put up with it longer. I'm glad you're taking the steps to end this marriage. Best wishes for you and your children xxx