Timeline for offer

[JillY1245]

I'm going through a divorce where my husband is seemingly doing absolutely nothing to try and negoitiate, and my solicitor's costs are ridiculous. We submitted an offer via his solicitor over a month ago, but apart from an email acknowledging the offer, I have had no further response, or counter offer. My solicitor says he HAS to respond, but I'm wondering how long he actually has to do this? Any idea? I've stopped corresponding with my solicitor as the bills are just huge and I'm getting absolutely nowhere. I need to respond now to questions regarding my Form E and I wonder if I can respond myself directly to his solicitor, or do I need to pay my solicitor to do this? And how can all this nonsense come to an end if her won't respond an submit an offer himself? I thought the whole idea was to try and negotitate (he suggested this himself during medation) via our solicitors? This looks like it could be dragging on for a very long time at this rate! Thanks for any useful help in advance!

Go to link above to ADVICE NOW.

they guides can be downloaded and tell you exactly what to do. They tell you what you need a solicitor for, what you don’t, and what you might. They explain law of “fair settlement”. They explain process.

I wouldn’t negotiate anything without form E and D81 being completed first . Why would you? I advise on here repeatedly not to agree to stbexH badgering with offers, to refuse to discuss until full legal financial disclosure is made. That is first step in financial process

the divorce petition can go ahead if you’ve not applied yet- seperate parellel process and don’t need any solicitor for.

My ex husband managed to drag things out for 7 years!!

Hi Appleofmyeye, Yes - Forms all done. Spent over £9,000 with solicitor already and just feel I'm wasting my money as husband doesn't respond. Repeated conversations with my solicitor and her sending emails/phone calls to his isn't getting me anywhere. First court hearing to submit paperwork and E forms are done, so solicitor submitted an offer. I was expecting a counter offer but I got nothing. It's all obviously games, but I was just wondering how long he had to play these games. He's stopped paying me any money (not even for my daughter, so CSA is beckoning, but they're in a right mess so God knows what will happen there). Our finances are complicated so the ADVICE NOW stuff wasn't as helpful as I thought it might be. Suggested the booklet may not be useful in my case. Right now I have almost zero cash flow as only have a PT job earning £700 a month, and have a 3 bed house, a daughter and a dog with vet's bills to pay for. The gas and electric alone take up half my money! I am quite literally having to borrow of people to live. I suspect this is his game - make me desperate and I'll accept any old rubbish offer when he finally decided to participate. He's in a very well paid job. No need for any of this behavour other than pure greed. Even if I wanted to accept a nonsense offer I couldn't, because there isn't one on the table! What exactly is the timeframe for him having to give me an offer? Standing on the court steps for the next hearing in February?? This is what it's looking like right now. So be if if that's how he wants to play it, but in the meantime I need to try and sort my case without an expensive solicitor.

MissSmiley.............7 YEARS!!! OMG! How did that happen? I thought we had 3 court dates and if we hadn't sorted it out ourselves at the second then the judge would at the third (and by that time we'd have wasted around £50,000 each!!!? The idea of this dragging on for 7 years is insane!! How did you cope???

Believe it or not we were fairkg amicable and agreed everything ourselves, we did have some mediation at the beginning but my ex found it upsetting. He just kept promising and time went by, he refused to use a solicitor too, heaven only knows how I coped, I’m a get it sorted kind of person, I think it was his way of exerting control.

Yes - It was me who wanted the divorce so this is very much my husband's only way of exerting any control over the situation. I just want to forget the solicitor myself. If I can manage without it would save the stress of THOSE bills at least! I just wonder how possible this actually is?

My solicitor stuck to his original quote of £1600, definitely avoid court if you want to keep the cost down. As the one who wanted the divorce I paid everything, so worth it though

Can you talk to your solicitor about making an application to your ex for legal costs - if he is dragging his feet and making extra work for the lawyers then you shouldn’t be made to pay for this. Perhaps the threat of it might be enough to make him hurry things along. Also be vigilant checking invoices from your lawyer - I found mine had been charging me for time They spent correcting mistakes they had made. When I complained they refunded those. Also I paid for my legal bills on a 12 month interest free credit card deal which I paid monthly minimum payments and then paid balance with part of settlement but would only recommend that if you can be disciplined enough not to get into debt with. Good luck!

If I were you, I would self represent until you can’t anymore and then bring your legal team back on board. You can respond yourself to his solicitors but only if you dis-instruct your solicitors first. They can still advise you in the background. If you are the applicant, a potential benefit for you is that the responsibility of preparing the ‘bundle’ for the hearing falls to your ex - there’s lots of work (ie cost) involved with producing this. You do have to keep on toP of them though, to ensure they don’t omit/include documents to skew things in their favour.

Do you have a copy of the Order that you are supposed to follow? The timeline for submitting everything is there. If you are each ordered to make offers, they should be exchanged at the same time. If theirs isn’t ready by the date/time
stipulated, simply send yours to court but not to them until they are also ready to exchange. This goes for all disclosure documents, too.

You/ your solicitor should chase anything that is submitted late.

How old is your dd?

Could it be he is stalling so that your dd will be 18 by the time the divorce goes through.