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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

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Original poster

Selling house when stbx refuses to allow admittance to potential buyers

22 replies

Anna713 · 02/12/2023 12:53

My son and young grandaughter are living with me whilst his divorce goes through and the marital home is sold. My son is currently waiting for an arrangement order to gain full custody of his daughter, whose mother hardly bothers seeing her. The marital home is in my sons sole name and he pays the mortgage. He is trying to sell the home but his stbx, who is living in the property, refuses to let potential buyers view the property. She just cancels any appointments. Has anyone any advice on what he can do? He is thinking about going to one of those we buy any house companies but obviously he would lose a load of money and he would not have any money for a deposit on a new home for him and his daughter.

OP posts:

Psychoticbreak · 02/12/2023 13:05

Yes the next time she goes out get a locksmith and change the locks. It is in his name so he can do this.

redastherose · 02/12/2023 13:05

He will need to get possession of the property before he can sell it, that can only be granted by a court if she refuses to leave the property voluntarily so he will need to discuss this with his solicitor as part of the divorce proceedings.

Also, regardless of whether the property is in your son's name he cannot just make her or demand that she leaves as she will have rights to the home as they are currently married.

Janieforever · 02/12/2023 13:07

He will need to go for possession annd eviction as part of divorce. However as they are married she’s rights to be there. So he will have to do this formally, he cannot sell the marital home from under her without formally going through proceedings and it’s appalling he is trying to, or that you’re supporting him in doing so. No matter the rights or wrongs, it’s the marital home.

he can move back in though, they have equal rights.

Janieforever · 02/12/2023 13:08

Psychoticbreak · 02/12/2023 13:05

Yes the next time she goes out get a locksmith and change the locks. It is in his name so he can do this.

No he cannot. She has rights to the marital home.

pinkfondu · 02/12/2023 13:14

The court is the only way

GrumpyPanda · 02/12/2023 13:14

Presumably he has keys to the property so could just let the agents in himself - if not, it's indeed locksmith territory. I doubt she's got the right to cancel appointments do he'd need to discuss that with agents but obviously not ideal for marketing the place. But definitely better than a firesale type setup.

Janieforever · 02/12/2023 13:15

GrumpyPanda · 02/12/2023 13:14

He can’t just sell it unless both agree, they need to go through divorce proceedings.

Wibblywobblylikejelly · 02/12/2023 13:18

There's no such thing as full custody in the UK.

He needs to return to court to apply for an occupancy order.

Does she leave the house for work?

Original poster

Anna713 · 02/12/2023 13:24

No. She doesn't leave the house for work atm. He is aware that although house is in his name she has rights too. I know full custody is not the correct term but I couldn't think what the correct term is. He wants his daughter to live with him all the time and the mother to have supervised visits. There are good reasons for this I don't want to go into on a public forum.

Thank you for the replies. Very useful.

OP posts:

Pixiedust1234 · 02/12/2023 14:26

I agree with the others. He needs to get his solicitor to draw up the relevant documents for a court order to sell. This is usually based around the financial consent forms too. Has he started on those or is he just focused on custody and selling the house?

To clarify. Me and DH are divorcing and need to sell the marital home so we can live separately. The court has to rubber stamp (or both agree via a solicitor) on the percentage we each receive before the house solicitor releases the money. Your son and dw need to also be in legal agreement on the split of the profit. Are they?

Original poster

Anna713 · 02/12/2023 15:28

@janieforever. Why is it appalling that I support him in trying to get my dil out of the house owned by him? He looks after and pays all the costs for their daughter not to mention the mental strain of emotionally supporting a child who doesn't understand why her mother hardly bothers to see her. I know he could move back in but his wife is abusive and that would be terrible for his daughter to witness. He pays the mortgage on the house. He is happy to sell the house, and give his wife half the equity. This is what she wanted at first but she has now changed her mind when reality hit home.

They do not agree on anything and do not communicate. It does look like he will have to obtain an occupation order.

OP posts:

Mumof3confused · 03/12/2023 11:19

Has he submitted Form A to court? This could take a really long time. She has rights to the house whilst they are married and if she’s had any legal advice they would have told her to register her home rights with the Land Registry. Check the title deeds.

Either way, it would look bad on your son in court if he tried to sell the house without any agreement about the divorce finances. You need to get this stamped and sealed, and if she won’t agree he will need to do this via the Courts. This can take a long time, he needs to issue proceedings (Form A) asap to get the ball rolling.

Your son needs legal advice. He needs to be careful not to make any wrong moves.

Mumof3confused · 03/12/2023 11:21

Also it might be better that he asks to change the mortgage to interest-only for a while instead of paying off equity. She will get a % of the equity once it’s sold. If he keeps paying off the loan for another year or so, she’s benefitting from that indirectly because the equity is increased.

Brainworm · 03/12/2023 11:27

He could also work with the estate agent to organise an open house day or to plan viewings on a day that he can be there. He can then let them in.

Pixiedust1234 · 03/12/2023 11:51

Why is it appalling that I support him in trying to get my dil out of the house owned by him?
It's appalling because you are supporting him in illegal activity. They are married therefore it is jointly owned. It is not just his.

He needs proper legal advice regarding divorce and the financials. He cannot evict her or sell the house without her agreement or a court order.

Original poster

Anna713 · 03/12/2023 12:39

Thank you for the responses. Some useful advice here. I should point out that initially my sons wife was happy to sell the house and split the equity. She changed her mind and allowed her dodgy drug dealing 'friend' to move in. Meanwhile my son is racking up debt whilst still paying the mortgage on a house he no longer lives in. My son has a decent job but he is so worried about costs. He is not the one who is appalling or is consciously trying to do anything illegal. He is trying to protect and support his vulnerable young daughter whilst working in a demanding job and trying to keep out of debt.

OP posts:

titchy · 03/12/2023 12:43

Then he needs to involve the courts. If he doesn't then he won't be able to sell with vacant possession and will lose his buyers, or face paying their significant costs in gaining vacant possession.

LemonTT · 03/12/2023 12:46

Your son got married and when he did he legally combined his wealth and income with his spouse. Thats basically the marital commitment. The rest is romantics dressing. If he didn’t take the time or effort to establish this before he married then that’s on him.

Because he married he doesn’t have a “his” asset. He has “their” assets. He is going to need a court order to say otherwise. He cannot sell the house or try to sell the house. He is a fool to try any of this without settling and agreeing the terms of his divorce. The financial elements of which will need to be signed off in court.

The more time you all waste making up rules about what you think should happen the longer and messier this will all take.

I wouldn’t be agreeing to estate agent visits or the sale of the house without a court order. It doesn’t matter if I said I would be ok with 50% of the equity at some point.

Neriah · 03/12/2023 12:57

Pixiedust1234 · 03/12/2023 11:51

He needs proper legal advice regarding divorce and the financials. He cannot evict her or sell the house without her agreement or a court order.

Edited

I can see no evidence at all that the OP asked for advice in, or suggested using, "illegal activity". The OP asked what was possible in terms of the problem - it was her son who said he was "thinking" about selling to a company, and she made no comment as to supporting that or not. Nor did she say that her son knew this strategy would not be possible or intended to do something illegal. Its entirely possible to think about options without realising the complications - it doesn't imply an action taken.

Original poster

Anna713 · 03/12/2023 12:58

Thanks. I can see he is going to have to involve the courts. God knows how he will pay for it, but at least I can see the next step forward. Will his wife have to fund any of this? Presumably she will have to pay for her own solicitor.

OP posts:

Pixiedust1234 · 03/12/2023 13:01

Only if she wants to involve a solicitor which might only be a one off to draw up documents. She is allowed to represent herself in court. She does not have to fund anything unless a court decides it.

You and your son need legal advice before you do anything else.

Original poster

Anna713 · 03/12/2023 13:02

Thanks Pixiedust. That is what we will do

OP posts:

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