Financial agreement woes.

[Lunaloo09]

Hello, this is my first ever post! A bit of history. Marriage was over. He had affair with gym bunny. I found out and asked him to leave. This was 2020. We kept finances as they were for agggges. I have only just managed to split the joint account payments so we now pay a set amount each month. I have also only just sorted a structure so that I am not always at home asking him to mind the boys. I have sorted the divorce and I am in the process of sorting out the finances regarding a financial agreement. I have 2 chn and DH wants to have a 50/50 split which I have agreed to. I am trying to work out what to do with regards to sorting the finances. I want to put the house on the market at the end of january. Until that time we will pay a set amount for the household bills and a set amount for the boys. Once that is sorted what do people suggest I do about financing the children's needs. Do I ask him to pay me half each month to me? DO we just agree to buy set things (not sure about this as there can be a million things that come up) Do I set up a bank account for it that we can both access? This is all so unknown? I have got a solicitor but I don't want to tell her what I want until I have the knowledge as she's costing me a fortune!

I might be wrong but I can’t imagine you can have an account you will both access. That sounds like a joint account which would be a bit odd with an ex as leaves you financially connected to him.

Presumably he transfers to you each month. You could use an app like splitwise to put all the costs in but I would just draw up a budget and get him to pay half.

I have 50/50 with my ex and I message him at the start of each month with his half of the costs (phones, glasses, braces, tutor etc) and he transfers it over. If there’s school trips etc we split them and he transfers me his half so I can pay the school. Anything over a £50 contribution each we discuss first.

Thank you both! It’s been doing my head in so this has clarified it for me! @sweetladyjane can I ask how you split your time?

They are with their dad Sunday morning through to Wednesday after school. I think it’s a bit unusual to split the weekend but that’s what works for us and the children. It started off as every other weekend but DC asked to increase it to 50/50.