Taking child on holiday

[Captain1]

My girlfriend has booked and paid for an expensive holiday over Christmas for her and her son (5).

The trip is from 17-31st, her ex had the boy the last 2 Christmas’s (for the day)

to be fair he never actually agreed to the trip as they couldn’t agree and it’s been booked since sept.

hes now saying she definitely can’t take him. She’s devastated as it’s a trip to Oz to see family and she will lose £1600 per ticket and hence says she will probably still go to minimise the loss.

she owed him £1000 for a separate issue and says she will keep it to offset the ticket.

Thoughts?

this trip covers time the child was presumably meant to be with the father

So she’s been incredibly unreasonable to book without consulting him

and you should butt out. let me guess…. a new relationship?

oh i see

you’re the ex

🙄

yeah she’s being unreasonable

you really didn’t need to do a reverse

Well obviously she shouldn't have booked it without his agreement. Although to be fair if she has close family (her parents?) in Oz, he should sometimes allow her to take the child there. They need to have a proper conversation about this - could they go to mediation?

Without a child arrangement order or another court order he can stop her leaving the country. The financial loss is on her and she still owes him money.

Of course until they sort out child arrangements neither of them can take the kid on holiday.

Basically two idiots making their child’s life harder not better.

She should have got a court order, she knew the ex would not agree.

They're both being unreasonable unless theres a huge backstory.

Shes unreasonable booking a holiday without permission. He's unreasonable to stop his child having a trip to see family, especially since he had the last 2 Christmas'. It's an amazing oppertunity for the child to see Australia and dads depriving them of it.

They need to communicate. It's understandable dad wants to see child over the christmas period, but should have come up with a compromise with mum of when else she could take child over.

Emergency court hearing?

Refusing a child a holiday is a dick move tbh

No chance of getting even an emergency court hearing at this stage. It wouldn't be considered a priority case.

She shouldn't have booked it but the court would probably let her go. It's paid for and the child has a right to spend time with family abroad.

The solution is to get a CAO in place so this doesn't happen again.

thanks,

I’m sort of in the middle and staying out of it.

the problem is I’m a sort of “devils advocate” type of guy so I can see both sides. I told her she should not have booked the tickets until she had a definite yes from him but she did it anyway hoping he would come round.

My GF works a weird shift pattern so a regular custody agreement is all but impossible. She basically goes month to month depending on her work roster. (She can be away for 1-5 days at a time). Shes quite lucky her ex is so flexible but I thought he might have let home go especially since he took him abroad for a week in the summer.

He’s also working over the period so large parts of it will be in childcare 😞

He’s also working over the period so large parts of it will be in childcare

irrelevant

and what on earth is she doing spending such money on a holiday when she owes at least one person (her ex no less) £1000

I’m sort of in the middle and staying out of it.

you are not in the middle of it.

You have squat all to do with it