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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

About to split

2 replies

unsureMom123 · 26/11/2023 21:22

My husband had an extramarital affair. It never manifested into sex as I found out in the planning stage. There were hundreds of messages, naked pictures, plans to hook up. Our relationship was hanging by a thread beforehand anyway. We have had counselling and it has not improved things. The trust is gone.

I genuinely feel like he hates me and only wants to save the marriage because it’s easier to stay. Financially also he would not be able to live in the area we currently live in.
He has mental health difficulties. It has been a very difficult relationship and I have ignored many red flags. He is aggressive and emotionally abusive, often ignoring me for days. We have two children. He is obsessed with one child and has a difficult relationship with the other. I think she reminds him of me actually.

Sexually, we are not matched. He shows no affection but turns all contact into pressure to have sex. If I don’t sleep with him he sulks for days.
I feel broken.

if anyone has any words of support or has been there I’d really appreciate it.

OP posts:
Jas683 · 27/11/2023 22:08

Crickey this sounds like something I recognise.

I was exposed to my ex husband having had an emotional affair which eventually took its toll on our relationship. This was just the thing that toppled us, he had similar mannerisms you describe and I eventually no longer make an effort to appease his rubbish personality.

It took 6 years of unhappiness for me to make the move and it's difficult but I knew I could not stay with him as I no longer liked or respected him in any way shape or form.

I hope whatever YOU choose is what you want.

unsureMom123 · 28/11/2023 06:36

Thank you @Jas683
it’s all so confusing. I’m sorry you went through that. Thank you for letting me in and seeing I’m not alone x

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