Separation

[L786]

Hi I just need someone to talk to I don’t have any friends I only have 1 sister she is the best but I find it hard to open up. I lost my mum in April so I’m still struggling. I have been with my husband since 2012 got married 2014 when I was 17 and he was 21 I’ve always been really mature for my age with everything I’ve been through in life I have 3 kids. We got married as I fell pregnant I did love him but tbh he wasn’t the nicest person no romance he didn’t make me feel special. Fast forward I stayed for our kids and maybe the thought of being alone scared me but I’ve just had enough I can’t do it anymore I think with losing my mum unexpectedly she was only 49 has a lot to do with it. He did not help at all with the kids or the cleaning or cooking was doing it all myself so have felt like a single mum from the start but I don’t know why I’m struggling and I think I should just take him back but I keep telling myself I’m too good for him he doesn't deserve me he’s never appreciated me. I think I’m just looking for someone to tell me I’ve done the right thing

You've done the right thing OP. I'm sorry you are going through this and he's not supported you through your grief.

Can you imagine the shared life you'd have in say 20 odd years when DC are grown? Better to do it now and enjoy the rest of your life.

He's shown you who he is, you and your DC deserve better.

Good luck.

Sounds like you are doing the right thing. I've been where you are and stayed for the children but it didn't get better it got worse. Although I wanted that perfect family, I now realise after being away that it's better for them not to be in that situation, rather than holding onto something that isn't healthy.

Not sure if you wanted to but you can I believe report your thread to MN and have it moved into the relationships board or start a new as it's busier there and you'll get more support from others who have been through it.

Keep your head up though, you'll be okay and with time you feel better!

This sounds exactly like my situation, you're doing the right thing I got married in 2003 just separated, wish I had done it sooner but always wanted a family, it has affected my kids they havent really had a normal upbringing as really speaking we've been separated for over 10 years and they know it's not right, I've put everything into looking after the kids but realise it probably wasnt the best thing to do, now I'm stuck in a house that the ex won't leave and I can't afford to live on my own

@Dogslife25 I’m so sorry you’re going through this especially when kids are involved. Im trying to make it easier for the kids and say to there dad we can still do things as a family like day outs etc but he’s saying no they just need to get used to it so he wants them for 2 days and I’ll have them for 5 I think he’s just really angry about this whole situation and he does not want us to have any communication which I think is ridiculous when we have 3 kids together