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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Original poster

Ex lied in financial settlement

42 replies

PearlJamily · 23/09/2023 20:18

Financial consent order has been signed by both parties and submitted to court, but not heard back yet. Ex ticked the box to confirm he has no intention of co-habiting. However, I have just found out that he is in fact already living with the OW. He has a lease on a rental property where he stays when he sees our kids a couple of days a week, but he spends the entire rest of the week at hers and commutes to work from there and back without ever visiting the rental unless the kids are coming. The lease on that is up very soon, so I assume he'll then be full time living at hers.
I have not applied for our final order (decree absolute) yet as solicitor advised me to wait until the finances were settled. Do I have any options for recourse given he's lied about his living situation, which will have materially affected the financial settlement? I assume it's complicated while he still has a rental lease so could continue to lie and say that's his home?

OP posts:
millymollymoomoo · 23/09/2023 20:48

He’s entitled to a fair share of marital assets and then move on

sk you now want more I presume?

Original poster
PearlJamily · 23/09/2023 20:49

You know nothing about the situation and what I got so please don't be nasty

OP posts:
Original poster
PearlJamily · 23/09/2023 20:51

I was simply asking whether I have the option for recourse if I felt it wasn't fair. I was not asking to be judged or criticised. More fool me for turning to Mumsnet

OP posts:
Isheabastard · 23/09/2023 21:09

Im not yet at the Financial Order, but I know my stbxh has omitted stuff on his Form E, so I have no personal experience of your situation. Mine has also binned his 2nd solicitor.

I know how much it hurts/angers one when you realise they will stoop so low to get a financial advantage.

But you have my every sympathy and I hope someone can help you.

Otherwise it’s your solicitor, and god don’t I know how expensive they can be.

Best of luck

Original poster
PearlJamily · 23/09/2023 21:12

@Isheabastard mine has also omitted a lot of information so I'm sorry you're having this issue too. I feel like I'm being completely screwed over but unless I had tens of thousands of pounds to throw at it (which I don't) then I'm powerless to fight it. Our legal system seems screwed regards divorce. Good luck to you with yours x

OP posts:
Original poster
PearlJamily · 23/09/2023 21:21

@millymollymoomoo you hit the nail on the head when you said he is entitled to "a fair share"- I have signed to agree to way beyond what is a "fair share" for him, after months of manipulation and bullying from him. Given that I wholly owned our house on my own before we met and and am now giving him half the equity so he can go blow it on gambling while living in his girlfriend's house I think I'll disregard your insinuation that l'm now after more of his money. But thanks for your input.

OP posts:
Totaly · 23/09/2023 21:25

I think you can. Can you claim help with solicitors fees? My friend is doing so at the moment. He claimed he’s split with his girlfriend - so they didn’t take into account her salary.

If someone is living with someone else their outgoings are much less than a single person. So he has more free money:

I would speak to the solicitor and as for a financial order - you should be getting more of your children live with you full time .

millymollymoomoo · 23/09/2023 21:27

I’m not being nasty

alll I said was he’s entitled to a share and then to move on

as are you

Rainbowqueeen · 23/09/2023 21:31

Living arrangements are taken into account at the time of divorce for splitting of assets. Ask your solicitor for advice. If you don’t have one, get one

Original poster
PearlJamily · 23/09/2023 21:32

"Sk (sic) you now want more I presume".

Disingenuous to now say you were not making assumptions about me. Whatever. Your post offered no actual response to what I was asking.

OP posts:
Original poster
PearlJamily · 23/09/2023 21:34

Rainbowqueeen · 23/09/2023 21:31

Living arrangements are taken into account at the time of divorce for splitting of assets. Ask your solicitor for advice. If you don’t have one, get one

Thanks yes I'm just worried as when I had the solicitor he lied and denied he was still even seeing the OW. So the settlement has been agreed on the basis that he is single and lives alone.

OP posts:
hotcandle · 23/09/2023 21:36

What date was the financial order signed and on what date do you roughly think he started cohabiting?

Maneattraction · 23/09/2023 21:49

Have a scroll through the questions on Insta - legal queen. She give answers to many questions along the same lines as yours. Very informative. Good luck, you sound like you’ve been more than fair with STBEX

https://www.instagram.com/thelegalqueen/reels/

millymollymoomoo · 23/09/2023 23:15

Whatever

your post gave zero pertinent information

do what you think is right

INeedAnotherName · 23/09/2023 23:27

millymollymoomoo · 23/09/2023 23:15

Whatever

your post gave zero pertinent information

do what you think is right

Do I have any options for recourse given he's lied about his living situation, which will have materially affected the financial settlement?

She asked about him lying on an official form. It's got nothing to do with fairness. Read her post properly.

Original poster
PearlJamily · 23/09/2023 23:31

Thanks @INeedAnotherName I don't understand why people have to jump on threads where they have nothing of use to input, only to seemingly be mean. I'm genuinely asking for help and advice.

OP posts:
millymollymoomoo · 23/09/2023 23:32

I don’t need to do anything
yes she could try to go back on the agreenemt
that Will cost time, money and emotions and ex, whether op likes it or not is entitled to a fair share independent of what future plans are , exactly sane as if op meets someone

no idea of the ins and outs of relationship or settlement but op only questioning whether she can get more .

op free to do what she likes

Original poster
PearlJamily · 23/09/2023 23:34

hotcandle · 23/09/2023 21:36

What date was the financial order signed and on what date do you roughly think he started cohabiting?

I signed it two weeks ago and I roughly think he started cohabiting about 2 months ago

OP posts:
Original poster
PearlJamily · 23/09/2023 23:35

millymollymoomoo · 23/09/2023 23:15

Whatever

your post gave zero pertinent information

do what you think is right

Thanks! I would've done that without posting here if I knew the answer 😁. Have a lovely evening and thank you so much for your help ❤️

OP posts:
Original poster
PearlJamily · 23/09/2023 23:37

millymollymoomoo · 23/09/2023 23:32

I don’t need to do anything
yes she could try to go back on the agreenemt
that Will cost time, money and emotions and ex, whether op likes it or not is entitled to a fair share independent of what future plans are , exactly sane as if op meets someone

no idea of the ins and outs of relationship or settlement but op only questioning whether she can get more .

op free to do what she likes

Where exactly did I ask about getting more? I asked about recourse for lying on a legal document.

OP posts:
fuckmyuteruslining · 24/09/2023 00:35

I think he is relying on the fact that he still had his own house. You know he's living with her but he has a address and bills. He will argue he's living in his house and staying with her. If you want to renegotiate then talk to your solicitor but I wouldn't spend time on this issue alone.

caringcarer · 24/09/2023 01:31

PearlJamily · 23/09/2023 21:21

@millymollymoomoo you hit the nail on the head when you said he is entitled to "a fair share"- I have signed to agree to way beyond what is a "fair share" for him, after months of manipulation and bullying from him. Given that I wholly owned our house on my own before we met and and am now giving him half the equity so he can go blow it on gambling while living in his girlfriend's house I think I'll disregard your insinuation that l'm now after more of his money. But thanks for your input.

Don't sign it. Sounds like you have a poor solicitor if that's the best they can get you. I'd go back to your solicitor and tell them they must do better. Explain about him living with OW. If this solicitor can't do better then I'd find a better one.

vivainsomnia · 24/09/2023 14:32

He isn't lying at this point since he still rents somewhere and therefore incur the costs associated with it.

The issue of him moving with her is in relation to his needs and that therefore his would be reduced moving with her and that "could" potentially impact on the division.

This would really depend on the settlement that's been agreed so far? How much do you think you lost out on because of his needs for his own place as opposed to sharing?

The issue is that ultimately, he still has his rental and paying for it and what he might do after is only supposition.

It's not uncommon at all, on either side, when in a new relationship before the final order to wait to move in together.

tescocreditcard · 24/09/2023 14:35

People lie on those forms all the time and I've never known anyone get penalised for doing so.

MsFannySqueers · 24/09/2023 14:49

Ignore the unhelpful posts OP. I got divorced over 30 years ago. It’s disheartening to read that nothing seems to have changed. My solicitor was useless. I think you need an awful lot of money in the bank for a red hot divorce solicitor and only those rich people who can afford it come out of a divorce well. My abusive ex lied and lied. I was broken and exhausted by the end of it. I didn’t have the money to pursue things with a new solicitor. For my own peace of mind I chose to ignore his lies. If you can just let it go and move on with your life. Easier said than done I know. Oh and my useless solicitor sent me a letter months later saying she had undercharged me by £250! So that had to be paid. A lot of money all those years ago.

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