Does anyone have any tips for my first official meeting with solicitor?

[QuimReaper]

We've spoken on the phone but I'm going in tomorrow for our first proper meeting since engaging her. She's very expensive so I was wondering if anyone has any tips for questions to ask, clarifications to seek, etc., that I may not have thought of?

Can't comment specifically on a divorce solicitor but I'd want to know:

1. How she works and how the process will work (overall and in terms of her/me).
2. What the baseline legal position is regarding whatever it is you're focused on -assets, childcare etc.
3. How long she expects this process to take.
4. What interaction she will have with ex's solicitor and what interaction I should have with ex or ex's solicitor.

Dot point all the issues you are concerned about (keep each line brief) and print out for solicitor. Keep emotion out of it, and stick to facts. They can read something like that very quickly, and then ask you to elaborate on anything they think is important.

Best advice (speaking as a lawyer) is never use your solicitor as a therapist. They are much too expensive for that. Get all your angst about how badly you have been treated and how much you want to punish them for that out with your best mate or a trained therapist and just give your lawyer the bare relevant facts about childcare or financial issues and your instructions about how to represent you.

If you have any questions about costs (although I see you have already enagaged her so presumably have a letter of engagement setting out costs basis) then ask her.

Have a typed list of very short simple questions you might want to ask her and hand it over in the meeting.
Try to keep as top issue that costs and risks must not out weigh settling - eg if you and husband have made offers to each other £100k apart offering husband extra £50k if the alternative is going to court and having to spend £200k makes sense. My husband and I did all negotiation between us to save costs and no disclosure as we knew 100% of each other's finances - everythingwas joint so we saved lots of money and had not a single court hearing nor financial disclosure forms.

Have a copy of a check l list ready for the Solicitor to keep on file of all the important dates and history of the relationship -
when met -
Names
moved in together
married
job wage + changes
property bought and rough values
children born
medical issues
back to work dates
date split up

Have financials ready for her - approximate value of any assets, including house, savings, pensions , and if you can , a list of expenses like bills, childcare etc. Ask what you can reasonably expect in terms of property and income, and also contact/residence.

Thank you all so much, this is great!