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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Original poster

Applying to court for a financial order

12 replies

LDA123 · 23/08/2023 12:35

Hi,

My solicitor has advised that it is sometimes beneficial to apply to court for the financial order in order to “focus the mind” of both parties.

I have a MIAM appointment today. Ex is refusing to complete form E or attend mediation. I believe even if we were to apply today, the first hearing would not be until early 2024.

On one hand, it seems a waste of money to pay £275 if no intention of going to court (I really hope we can sort it out without court) but on the other hand, I really don’t want it dragging on and on forever. I just need closure now and to move on with life.

Has anyone applied to court but then miraculously manage to sort everything out before the first hearing date? Or did it just make the whole situation worse…

Thanks!

OP posts:
Tryingmyhardesteveryday · 23/08/2023 14:21

Hi, I am in a similar situation to you I wanted to try mediation but ex refused unless I paid for him (which obviously wasn’t going to be beneficial to me as gave him no insentive to come to an agreement). I have then received emails from solicitors to say he doesn’t want to go to court and wants to negotiate but we are two months down the line and no further forward so I have applied to court in the hope it will give him a kick up the backside to get it sorted!!
haven’t heard back from his solicitor yet so we will see shortly if it makes it worse

Original poster
LDA123 · 23/08/2023 20:36

Had the MIAM appointment today and she is going to give him 10 days to respond to the mediation request. Will see what happens…

OP posts:
Rose7728 · 24/08/2023 09:14

Hi

Yes my DP did this and it was worth the 275 quid as his ex refused everything but as soon as the court date was looming she decided to settle the day before she was due in court. still didnt give him a form E but hey ho. Court does tend to focus the mind of people who refuse to negotiate

Original poster
LDA123 · 26/08/2023 08:03

Tryingmyhardesteveryday · 23/08/2023 14:21

Hi, I am in a similar situation to you I wanted to try mediation but ex refused unless I paid for him (which obviously wasn’t going to be beneficial to me as gave him no insentive to come to an agreement). I have then received emails from solicitors to say he doesn’t want to go to court and wants to negotiate but we are two months down the line and no further forward so I have applied to court in the hope it will give him a kick up the backside to get it sorted!!
haven’t heard back from his solicitor yet so we will see shortly if it makes it worse

Any updates on your situation? So far, he hasn’t responded to the mediation request. My plan is to represent myself in court as I do not have the funds to pay for a solicitor. The website I am L.I.P. looks super helpful.

OP posts:
Tryingmyhardesteveryday · 26/08/2023 08:14

@LDA123 no not yet apparently ex was suppose to be seeing his solicitor this week so was hoping for a better settlement but so far heard nothing! Haven’t heard back from the court yet either not sure how long that will take! I’m using a solicitor but not sure how I’m going to pay for it still hoping To settle out of court. Sorry to hear you still haven’t heard anything it’s mentally draining isn’t it!!

Original poster
LDA123 · 26/08/2023 08:20

It’s so draining. I just feel like I’m stuck in limbo. Where we are, there are big delays so even if apply in September, the first hearing probably won’t be until March 2024. But at least an end date in sight. Fingers crossed you settle out of court.

OP posts:
Tryingmyhardesteveryday · 26/08/2023 08:27

@LDA123 yes that is how I feel to I just want to move on with my life and I can’t properly as it’s just hanging over me!! Well it might be worth applying as it may give him the kick up the bum he needs as it will show how serious you are!

Redlarge · 26/08/2023 08:48

I couldnt do mediation due to dv. Went straight to court with a solicitor £18k and 3 years later he was deliberately not filling in forms correctly and not providing disclosure. In the end we had 2 hearings and had to go to final hearing. I ended up representing myself after second hearing as ran out of money and tbh solicitor wasnt much help.
I offered 2 wop offers to get an out of court settlement b4 final hearing which he turned down. I went to final hearing and the judge ordered he give me more than i asked for. He was given 56 days to pay up. Thart was 4 months ago so now i have to pay to go back to court to enforce the court order.
Dont expect favourable terms just because you are a woman with kids. Its very much 50.50 and no one gives a shit if they lie or hide finances.
You just have to stick at it. Good luck op xxxx

Tryingmyhardesteveryday · 26/08/2023 08:56

@Redlarge thank you for sharing! We don’t have any kids together and I am not trying to get more then I think I should he is offer was only 35% total assets and I’m just asking for closer to 50% so I can hopefully buy a home for me and my daughter

Original poster
LDA123 · 26/08/2023 09:08

Redlarge · 26/08/2023 08:48

I couldnt do mediation due to dv. Went straight to court with a solicitor £18k and 3 years later he was deliberately not filling in forms correctly and not providing disclosure. In the end we had 2 hearings and had to go to final hearing. I ended up representing myself after second hearing as ran out of money and tbh solicitor wasnt much help.
I offered 2 wop offers to get an out of court settlement b4 final hearing which he turned down. I went to final hearing and the judge ordered he give me more than i asked for. He was given 56 days to pay up. Thart was 4 months ago so now i have to pay to go back to court to enforce the court order.
Dont expect favourable terms just because you are a woman with kids. Its very much 50.50 and no one gives a shit if they lie or hide finances.
You just have to stick at it. Good luck op xxxx

Sorry your experience wasn’t good, that all sounds absolutely horrible and what a nightmare to live with for all those years. I really hope he pays soon so you can move on.

OP posts:
Redlarge · 26/08/2023 10:49

Tryingmyhardesteveryday · 26/08/2023 08:56

@Redlarge thank you for sharing! We don’t have any kids together and I am not trying to get more then I think I should he is offer was only 35% total assets and I’m just asking for closer to 50% so I can hopefully buy a home for me and my daughter

You should get 50. Thats only fair.

Redlarge · 26/08/2023 10:51

LDA123 · 26/08/2023 09:08

Sorry your experience wasn’t good, that all sounds absolutely horrible and what a nightmare to live with for all those years. I really hope he pays soon so you can move on.

Show quote history

Me too lovely. He doesnt pay child maintenance either so i have been completly financially done over by him. We cant even move house as he wont sigh the forms 😔

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