Hi there. So my husband randomly and quickly became a Muslim, started peppering his language and saying we weren't truly married anymore. Scared the fuck out of me since he had been isolating prior and going back and forth from left and right wing politics.
I kicked him out. He's not my child's father and this would surely show everyone how strange he is instead of me suffering alone with his increasing violent tendencies, punching holes in the house to intimidate me from asking questions, dominating me sexually calling me all sorts, sleeping with prostitutes then telling me later.
Anyway, he's got 50/50 of my daughter and the court are asking him all about what holidays he would like to celebrate with her. He forgot to mention the Islamic holidays since it was all a terror tactic for my benefit.
He lives with his parents, can't drive, has documented psychosexual problems that see him exhibiting behaviourrs that worried me. I was basically told I was overreacting in court.
If you can avoid family court, do, as it's a really not nice process that forces you to relive abuse then tell you it never happened.
As for coping with access. Simply keep busy when the child is not with you. Oh and by the way, I went on two dates this week while my daughter was away. I found out I'm not that bad at pool and there are people out there who are interesting and fun and not desperate to get into your knickers either.
I had a ball actually. I pottered about the house, tidied up, and made great use of the time. I'm in therapy for the symptoms that are caused by contact with him, as it's not something I am allowed to avoid, so it must make me stronger instead.
This is my new mantra; anything that threatens to bring you down in life, ensure it helps you level up instead.