Oh dear what a mess!

[Bluebaron1]

So my wife left me and family the home after a long separation this year and in a panic I said I would pay her rent at a new place plus a chunk of change to furnish it.

Then I met someone else who has unexpectedly become pregnant with twins (with me).

So now my solicitor has told me I shouldn’t have paid the ex’s rent as it will go against me in the divorce, I suggested we swap places and was told no that’s even worse as she will have a better claim against the family home.

Then I suggested moving in with the new partner and was told absolutely not as her income/assets would count against me in divorce!

so now I don’t know what to do!

I wanted to sell the main home and get the divorce all sorted ASAP but trying to keep it for 2 more years due to Morgage commitments (£30k redemption) and give my older teens stability but now proving very hard.

Feeling a bit stupid to be fair.

Im not surprised! Your wife leaves this year and you have a girlfriend pregnant with twins. And it is only just past the half way point of the year.

Where are the teenagers living?

With me

Why did your ex leave the kids and the house? Did she want to? Would probably be better for your teens if their mum came home and you went to live with your new partner. Then you can support her with her pregnancy and the birth of your children and all that is involved with twin new borns. I very much doubt your teens will want to be around that all the time I'm afraid.

Whoa, I disagree. The teens want the stable parent who has stuck around. The teens would move out if they didn't want to stay with OP.

I have no idea on the money split what is fair or not.

How far along is girlfriend's pregnancy?

Mess indeed

I don't see why paying her rent will go against you - surely you could just argue it was a short term agreement to give her time to get herself sorted - even spousal support these days generally has a time limit on it.

Meet with your wife - say you need to finalise the divorce and start discussions

Can't see her being overly agreeable though since you've managed to get your very new girlfriend pregnant with twins 😳

Very messy

It's always twins.

she met someone new 3 years ago and we tried living together for as long as possible to give the teen’s stability. I met someone late last year who obviously wasn’t happy with the domestic setup so she agreed to move out if I paid the rent.
i was thinking it might be better at least in the short term for my new partner to have a separate place as she can claim benefits that wont be available if I move in.

Twins and fiddling benefits 👏

And there we have it.

How is that fiddleing Benefits if she’s entitled to then? I don’t know if Im ready to live with her , (despite the baby issue!).

Because you are in a relationship and could (and should since you have 2 babies on the way) live together - but you are deliberately choosing not to so she can claim more benefits

No I’m not, I’m choosing not to live with her as I’m not ready to do that until my divorce is finalised and I’ve figured out the best course for my older children and everyone.
The benefits issue is an issue for her. I’m sure she would be annoyed if I moved in and she potentially lost her only source of income.

Many women chose not to live with partner to ensure they don’t lose UC so it’s no different here.

Teenagers are not going to want to live with twin newborns! And their mum has only been out of the house for a few months, after an entire lifetime of living with them, hardly unstable.
I think you really need to be there with your new partner. Having twins is a massive undertaking, it shouldn't be done on your own. Its really hard.