Financial consent order not approved

[Therewere5inthebed]

What happens now please? I’ve been down an internet rabbit hole but nothing seems to apply to this situation.

I signed everything over to abusive ex as I valued my mental health over the money that is so important to him.
He made it clear that he would make me run up a vast legal bill before giving me a penny so I took the chance that it would be refused by a judge.

I had no legal representation (as I would rather walk away with my recent inheritance intact and use it to help provide a roof over our heads than risk it and end up with nothing) he has a solicitor.

The reasons for refusal are as below:

‘It is unclear whether the respondent has obtained indepent legal advice.

The result of the draft order appears to be that the applicant (him) receives 100% of the marital assets, with the respondent’s needs being met by what appears to be entirely non-marital assets. Furthermore notwithstanding the above the applicant would still receive more than the respondent irrespective of the source of the asset.

Please explain how that outcome is fair taking account of the section 25 factors.’

i don’t know where to start with this.. what do I need to do and what is the procedure going forward and rough timelines please?

It's worth spending a bit of money on getting proper legal advice. It doesn't have to mean spending thousands, but you need to prove that you understand that you are giving up marital assets if you want the consent order to stand. Or find out how much it would cost to have a judge decide the split. Your ex can be as much as a dick as he likes but the judge needs to be satisfied that what is in the consent order is fair and that you both understand the implications. Having a solicitor on your side doesn't have to mean that you are fighting what your ex wants, just that you are proving to the court that you know what you're doing.

@Fourmagpies thsnk you so much for your reply. Unfortunately I have no funds for legal advice and I just want rid of him!

I’m thinking of ringing the contact number on the form and asking for advice on how to proceed.

Take legal advice so you can prove to the judge you have. And then reiterate that you are happy with the order as it is. The judge needs to be satisfied that you understand that you may be entitled to more of the matrimonial assets.

Use part of your inheritance for legal representation. The judge won't approve an unfair split, esp without you being represented.

I'm a solicitor, but NOT a family solicitor.

The Judge is basically saying that the draft is v one sided in your ex's favour and wants to be satisfied you've had advice. (Ie) that you're going into this with you're eyes open.

This website (not my firm) I found through a Google search explains the section 25 factors

www.herrington-carmichael.com/expertise/family-law/section-25-statement/

If you can get advice, do. Good luck

Sorry as for what happens. Nothing will happen until a response is sent to the judge dealing with his queries.

if you’ve walked away with nothing can you tell us how much the property was worth and his pension?

In my case my ex wanted to sign over 100% of the house to me, we kept our own pensions (but mine was more valuable than his). He also said he did not want legal representation and would just sign the divorce papers. He did this through guilt as he was having an affair.

When I enquired about a divorce the solicitor said this financial arrangement it would never be approved by a judge as it was too inequitable - with myself clearly taking the larger 'inequitable' portion.

The solicitor said that presenting the financial details was not compulsory, but could be challenged by my ex post divorce - hence potentially leaving me in the vulnerable position. However we're he to get married again he could no longer challenge it. I therefore took the gamble not to have the financials approved, and it was fine as he did marry the affair partner soon afterwards.

Therefore could you start the proceedings again and go down this route ?

you need a solicitior - it does not have to be that expensive

but get advice - why walk away and let him win???

@titchy, unfortunately my inheritance is currently in probate but that would be the ideal solution.

@poppitypop1 thank you for the link, I have looked up the section 25 factors and it was a bit of an eye opener. He bullied me so much that despite being split for almost three years I’m still a bit scared of him. He’s been vile over me going to the CMS to get maintenance as he has gone from paying nothing to paying a fortune (only one payment so far) but I previously had nothing from him in almost three years so had no choice really as I was really struggling while he, as usual was living the life of Riley.

@Quitelikeit He had no pension until recently so it’s all about the marital home, it is worth approx £650000, outstanding mortgage of £400000.

@ItsReallyOnlyMe I want the loose ends tied, he’s not trustworthy and is selfish and greedy so I won’t feel at peace until it’s all signed and sealed.

I'm proud of you for putting your mental health first. That's really important. But please do see if you can get some proper advice as the route you are going down is very unfair to you. Money isn't everything but make sure you have enough to be okay. Also see if this might help you in the proceedings too. Some free help guides that explain the entire process in case you find paying for a solicitor difficult xxx https://www.iamlip.com/

Apologies it's off topic, have you ever seen the good wife show, and how realistic would you say it is with regards to how they portray different legal cases?

@Therewere5inthebed
All the best and positivity op, I don't have any legal knowledge but all the best.

Hi OP
Family law solicitor here.
Even if you demonstrate to the court that you have had independent legal advice, the court may not be prepared to make the order if it considers it still falls outside the court’s statutory discretion, being so weighted in his favour. Nothing will happen unless you write into the court now, and the court may require a hearing even after you write in. The court cannot at this point substitute a new order for the agreement but may be persuaded to make the agreement after considering your written response or at a hearing. It may be possible to renegotiate your current deal to the extent where you can persuade the court to approve it. If not, one of you will have to issue contested financial proceedings if you want the court to consider matters afresh. For now, you will need to get legal advice and consider with your solicitor how you can demonstrate to the court how your current or a renegotiated agreement does fall within the law.

Advice Now guides might have some starting stuff or pointers where to go next, or wikivorce helpline may also have some stuff

www.advicenow.org.uk/file/2802/download?token=an35ko8n

Or from this page you click download(don't need the paid options it's free)

www.advicenow.org.uk/guides/sorting-out-your-finances-when-you-get-divorced

@Therewere5inthebed do you mind if I ask the value of your inheritance please? I’ve been threatened by my STBXH during legal proceedings that he will take my inheritance (it hasn’t mixed the matrimonial pot). He is a high earner and doesn’t need it. It has caused me so much anxiety.

Does he know you have this inheritance?

Maybe if you declared it to the judge then he might understand

Also consider asking him for 50k telling him that’s the way to get it signed off?

It is very unfair that the current legal system in the UK actually seems to reward abusive controlling spouses. Sorry you are going through this.

There really should be some fast track for people who have controlling and abusive exes as the system is sadly failing them at the moment. There should also be financial penalties for people who wont agree a reasonable financial split. The system just rewards the narcissists at the moment imo and allows them to continue their abuse.

Perhaps if you can stand it, you could push for a financial remedy order (and go straight for that). I think court can cost up to 30k - you'd have to ask a solicitor, but if there is 200k equity it could be worth it. Re inheritance, if you inherited after the split, it's unlikely he would have a claim. It is probably worth finding out from a solicitor what a likely outcome of court would be.

However, I understand where you are coming from, in my experience controlling exes can and do string things out and just create drama and ongoing stress.

Do what is best for you. You could put in a court application for a financial remedy order if you have the energy for one final push and it is worth your while financially. You are probably going to need a solicitor though by the sounds of it to get a judge to sign anything off, so you may have to engage in that or be stuck in limbo which may be more painful long term.

The inheritance is likely to be included. He wouldn’t necessarily have a claim but ops claims oh joint marital assets may reduce as inheritance provides for her needs to some extent therefore may not need such a % of marital assets
very few people come out of divorce feeling settlement fair
high esrbers who lose Majority they have worked and paid for
men ( or women ) who end up paying fir spouses who refuse to work
stay at home mums ( usually) who feel
inpacted due to lack of earning power
One party whose inheritance is included while the others ( yet to receive) would not

etc etc

take legal advise at the very least and weigh up whether worth trying for more

It seems the court is rejecting on the basis that the spilt is unfair and you have no legal representation flagging this up. I know you want to be rid of him so much that you are willing to accept unfair, but the court aren't.

You took the chance a judge would step in and they have. Now you need to contact and ask what you should do next.

OP I am no legal expert and I have no experience of this but I came across this post. You mentioned CMS so I take it there are children involved. I think you need to think of it as getting the right settlement for them rather than for yourself in this situation. I hope you can get some advice. Don’t let this bully win!

Not me personally but my solicitor told me of a case - when I asked him what the likelihood of my financial consent being refused (70/30 split in my favour - no pension sharing even though mine is worth 10 times his)

He had a case of a second marriage. The man hadn't worked as his rich second wife pretty much bankrolled him. The divorce was 90/10 in her favour no pension sharing. The chap wanted to just walk away. Judge refused and the chap was just asked to go to court to confirm he understood the implications of what he had agreed to (he didn't have a solicitor either). He said yes. Judge apologised for wasting everyone's time and approved the financial order

You can get some legal advice for maybe £150-£200 via an email and then try again but where is asks if you have legal advice/representation say you have sought advice and input the solicitor details. That should get it over the line.

If the inheritance is in probate it's not officially yours yet is it?

OP my exh was horrible to me because I caught him cheating and wouldn't take him back. He used to send me nasty text messages about 6 a day. It was constant harassment and I just couldn't take any more so I told my solicitor to get me a fair settlement but not to keep asking me things just tell me at the end what I got. For context we had a house, a business I had 48 percent shares, savings, ISA's, a caravan and 3 children and 2 pensions. I asked for 50/50 but he refused. He offered me the house with mortgage still on it if he could have business. Business valued at almost 6 times the house. He argued with valuation for business even though he approved firm doing valuation. He refused to turn up in court twice giving a different excuse each time. He took months to produce his pension statements even though I had a photo copy of his latest statement. He kept trying to bully me telling me if I didn't give him the business he wouldn't be able to pay child support. I went to stay with my Mum about 200 miles away and switched my phone off. The solicitor phoned my Mum because I told her to ring once it was sorted. We had to go to court and the judge told DH he was being unreasonable and I ended up getting 63 percent of the house as the children were staying with me and he only wanted EOW and 1 night dinner or cinema in midweek but no midweek sleepover. Caravan was sold money shared equally and judge ordered either business sold as going concern and money split as per shares or exh could buy me out. Exh was fuming. Shouted at judge and my solicitor. Judge ordered pension sharing too which meant I got about 1/3 of his pension to balance it up. He traded his share of house for shares in business and ended up getting a huge business loan to buy me off. We were married for 20 years and have been divorced for 18 years and he still bad mouths me to children at every opportunity. 1 child no longer speaks to him and second child has cut contact with him. He sees third child more frequently. Just hand it all over to a solicitor and tell them just tell me at the end.