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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Original poster

School Fees

8 replies

BlastedPimples · 21/06/2023 11:12

My stbxh told me via email he had remortgaged one of our buy to let houses last October specifically to pay for 2022-2023 school fees.

He still hasn't paid the fees. I do not know where that money has gone. He's spent it.

The school are chasing me too because as a co signatory of the contract, they regard me as liable.

He now says I am liable for half of the fees when I have zero earnings or savings. He's spent and sold or remortgaged everything.

We have a divorce hearing in July. Am I to expect to be liable for school fees because he's decided the money earmarked for them has been spent elsewhere by him?

OP posts:
LemonTT · 21/06/2023 12:20

its a difficult one. He borrowed money against an asset which comes at a cost. That will need to be factored into your asset share. Hopefully you will eventually see the money when you get you FDR. But these things aren’t always certain.

in the meantime you are both liable for school fees and will be perused by the bursar. One or both of you will have to pay. There is a possibility that you could go to court and apply for interim maintenance but you need to get legal advice v

RandomMess · 21/06/2023 12:22

I think you need to give notice to the school ASAP. He is going to use them to cripple you and control you.

unfortunateevents · 21/06/2023 12:30

RandomMess · 21/06/2023 12:22

I think you need to give notice to the school ASAP. He is going to use them to cripple you and control you.

Sorry, no advice on paying thisyear's fees, but yes regardless of what happens there, as a matter of priority you need to find new school places for your children for September. The current school certainly won't have them back if there is an entire year's fees outstanding.

alwaysonadiet1 · 21/06/2023 12:41

Have you asked the school if they can help? A friend was given 80% off one years fees in a similar situation.

BoohooWoohoo · 21/06/2023 12:44

I hope that your child is leaving school this year. If not you need to hand in your notice now so that you won't be liable for fees from Jan 2024. Your ex clearly has no plans to pay any more.

Original poster
BlastedPimples · 21/06/2023 13:02

Yes yes I have given notice to the school. They have been amazingly supportive. But obviously they want paying for this last term.

OP posts:
Original poster
BlastedPimples · 21/06/2023 16:30

Maybe I should offer to work for the school to help pay off what is owed?

I am mortified by all this.

OP posts:
WinchSparkle80 · 21/06/2023 16:52

This happened to my friend. 2 issues,

  1. as jointly liable to the school, they can come after either or both of you for the fees owed.
    His remortgaging and spending any cash will diminish his share of the joint assets so long term it won’t be a huge hit to you.

  2. Until it is confirmed by a judge/court as part if financial settlement he doesn’t have to continue paying them even if he promised etc (but is still liable for unpaid ones as are you)

Hopefully point 2 is a moot point but from memory because my friends STBEH skipped the country with his new bit of stuff my friend got stung for the lot. She had no cash but the school were awesome and let her pay it in small installments with a large chunk once divorce came through.

Good Luck!

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