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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Child maintenance and pay rises

7 replies

NeedSleepNow · 04/06/2023 10:08

My husband and I separated 2 years ago and we agreed a child maintenance figure between us at the time using the cms calculator and he has paid that rate ever since. Going through divirce/mediation at the moment and I now know that he had a pay rise a year ago and probably has had another this year (I can't tell at he didn't submit all of the correct info with his form E).

It means the rate he is now paying in maintenance is less than it should be. Do those who have an agreement between themselves reassess what the non resident parent is paying or do you just keep it fixed forevermore?

I haven't asked for anything extra as he had been spinning the narrative to everyone that he is so poor, I take all his money.... and I felt guilty and sorry for him but I am really struggling financially at the moment. The kids are constantly growing needing new shoes and clothes, school trips, extra curricular activities, it just feels like a never ending stream of outgoings and even a small amount extra in maintenance would help.

At the moment based on his last payrise it would be £30 a month extra but if he has had a another rise since then it would be £60 a month extra or more. It's not huge amounts extra but it would be a massive help as it equates to a pair of school shoes or two highly expensive branded school jumpers each month and he refuses to help with school uniform costs etc.

Would you flag it up with him and try to reassess maintenance yearly or just leave it as it is? He was financially abusive and I hate asking him for money so I am tempted to leave it as is but it really would help with paying for the kids' clothes etc. If things get really bad I can stop their after school activities but I have desperately been trying to keep those going so that they have a bit of normality and their usual routine.

OP posts:
3peassuit · 04/06/2023 10:15

If he’s on paye, I would go through CMS. They do an annual review and would calculate increases. If you don’t want to go through CMS, I would ask him to show you his p60 each year so you can recalculate the maintenance owed.
You are not “asking him for money” you are telling him to contribute the correct amount for his children’s upkeep.

YomAsalYomBasal · 04/06/2023 10:18

Just get CMS to deal with it

LittleOwl153 · 04/06/2023 10:23

I'd go with CMS, they will give you an accurate calculation and if need be he can stump up extra through collect and pay.

wobytide · 04/06/2023 10:43

Even if his pay has increased he may have adjusted pension contributions meaning the CMS figure could stay the same. Just something else to factor in how the figures are calculated

NeedSleepNow · 04/06/2023 10:52

3peassuit · 04/06/2023 10:15

If he’s on paye, I would go through CMS. They do an annual review and would calculate increases. If you don’t want to go through CMS, I would ask him to show you his p60 each year so you can recalculate the maintenance owed.
You are not “asking him for money” you are telling him to contribute the correct amount for his children’s upkeep.

If you go through cms does he not then have to pay extra and I receive less? It's all a bit complicated and I can't quite work out how everything is calculated!

OP posts:
NeedSleepNow · 04/06/2023 10:54

wobytide · 04/06/2023 10:43

Even if his pay has increased he may have adjusted pension contributions meaning the CMS figure could stay the same. Just something else to factor in how the figures are calculated

Thanks, I don't think he has altered his pension contributions from the payslips I have seen, unless he has upped them in the last 6 months.

OP posts:
waterSpider · 04/06/2023 15:05

NeedSleepNow · 04/06/2023 10:52

If you go through cms does he not then have to pay extra and I receive less? It's all a bit complicated and I can't quite work out how everything is calculated!

That part is only if you rely on them for collection. If you keep the paying bit between yourselves, and only use them for the calculation, then those charges don't apply.

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