How to tell the kids

[Thetimeisnow12]

We have been married almost 12 years
9yo boy , 6yo girl (almost 10/7 of relevant)

how do we tell them?

dh is going to move out next week andd we plan for him to have the kids in our home every other weekend and Tuesday night and I’ll stay out when he does initially.

we plan to tell them tonight and tips that have helped?

thank you d

Hi 👋 Op
You Need to tell your children, that you both love them lots still,
You both splitting up, doesn't change that at All. !

That's a fact,

It's just you are finding it both far too difficult emotionally to live with each other any longer,

Or
Something along those lines

Both living in separate houses,

Still means you love each other,

It means you both can appreciate each other in a better way , living separately, ect

IME my 6/7 year old found it very difficult having her father back in the home after he left when he has covered school holidays. (He doesn't have overnights as he doesn't have suitable accommodation) so you may wish to revisit that plan. The coming and going upset and confused her.

Yes, I think short and to the point is the key. Do not go into details. They need to know what is happening (eg parents are separating) and that you love them very much and it is not their fault. That is all.

I think that, as always, kids will look at the parents and mimic their feelings. You should try to stay strong and rational and hopefully your husband will as well. They need to know that no matter what happens they will be safe and loved, so no matter what you are going through emotionally, do not show it to your kids. You need to appear strong and this will give them the assurance they need.

While divorce is most definitely hard and emotional experience, it is not the end of the world, life will go on. It will be different and perhaps more difficult at times, but you will manage. Good luck OP.

I am also finding these really helpful too as me and DH are also splitting. Our son is 14 and daughter is 11. It is so heartbreaking. We are waiting until next weekend to tell them but the waiting is killing me. Sending 💐