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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Original poster

CHILD BENEFIT

18 replies

AlmostDoneIn · 28/03/2023 21:07

So one day my ex husband decided he wanted a divorce for no apparent reason.
I let him keep everything, except the kids and a small payout from the house, which has since been used for private renting.
Fast forward a year.
We have been co-parenting for this duration without any problems,infact I think it actually benefitted the children.
All of a sudden he's turned nasty, and I've just had a letter through from HMRC telling me he's trying to claim for one of the children.
So £50 short because he's filed this, now it won't make a difference as he earns to much to be able to use it (he's just going to have to pay it back in April)
When I asked him why, he said to contribute to his pension.
This is a man that has done nothing for any of us for 15 years! Is there a way to explain this to HMRC?
Many thanks for reading,
A very mentally drained mother.

OP posts:
RandomMess · 28/03/2023 21:21

Do you have 50:50 shared care is the DC?

ArcticSkewer · 28/03/2023 21:24

Are you sure he earns too much to keep it? If so, make sure hmrc know if he wins his claim for cb. Are you contesting it and do you have proof you are the main resident parent?

If he's paying more into his pension to keep his wages down though, he may be wanting to reduce cms payment as well next.

cocksstrideintheevening · 28/03/2023 21:54

Are you the RP?

Original poster
AlmostDoneIn · 29/03/2023 00:04

We decided to do 50:50. No court order or anything in place

OP posts:
Original poster
AlmostDoneIn · 29/03/2023 00:10

ArcticSkewer · 28/03/2023 21:24

Are you sure he earns too much to keep it? If so, make sure hmrc know if he wins his claim for cb. Are you contesting it and do you have proof you are the main resident parent?

If he's paying more into his pension to keep his wages down though, he may be wanting to reduce cms payment as well next.

Yes 100% I've got messages also acknowledging this. Wants it just to "boost his pension".
From what I can work out when you are 50:50 parenting it's hard to prove who the main care giver is, we bought the house together so all the doctors, schools, dentist ect were registered at that address which he is living in. I didn't think I had any need to change it all until now. Naive I know.
I tried to call CB but didn't get any joy, they don't seem interested. I've got the form that was sent to me which is pretty generic and will just add the pension statement on to that.
He already told me he is stopping the CM as I wouldn't do as he said an sign one of the kids CB over to him.

OP posts:
ArcticSkewer · 29/03/2023 07:11

If you are 50:50 then some people do split the child benefit and I don't think you can argue that you are the resident parent.

Just inform hmrc and disengage. Your ex is obviously a bit thick or vindictive but I expect that's why he is an ex so that won't come as a surprise. You seem to have missed your chance to get a better divorce settlement (have you done the financial consent form?) so that was your choice. Just walk away and be happy. It's your best revenge.

RandomMess · 29/03/2023 09:30

Just select having the youngest child yourself.

Bunnyhascovidnoteggs · 29/03/2023 09:36

Ime contact your MP.
Mine sorted my CB out when exh made a counter claim.
Firstly send CB a detailed schedule of when you have the dc. Include utility bill costs /food and clothing that you buy /pay for. Email a screen shot of exh message about his pension. He is admitting a government benefit meant for dc is being used to benefit him...

Dinopawus · 29/03/2023 09:38

Not completely understanding here, but the fact that he has raised the issue of his pension, makes me question if he is wanting to pay extra into his pension to avoid paying extra tax on the CB.

Or to put it the other way round, using the CB to pay extra into his pension.

I would try to push back. If you live separately, and your household income is below £50k, the money gets spent on the DC and not ex's pension.

vivainsomnia · 29/03/2023 10:08

So he is paying more towards his pension to lower his taxable income that makes him eligible for CB. Perfectly allowable. If you do have shared care, it's fair enough he should be able to claim half.

ArcticSkewer · 29/03/2023 10:12

vivainsomnia · 29/03/2023 10:08

So he is paying more towards his pension to lower his taxable income that makes him eligible for CB. Perfectly allowable. If you do have shared care, it's fair enough he should be able to claim half.

I asked this earlier but op says no, he acknowledges he earns too much to keep it and will have to pay it back again.

Maybe op misunderstood but some men are also knobs and do stuff just to wind up the other person and 'because they can' or 'point of principle'

divorceadviceneeded · 29/03/2023 10:33

I might be wrong but is he claiming it so that he benefits from the NI implied contributions when you claim CB for kids under 12?

RandomMess · 29/03/2023 10:46

He is increasing/maximising his pension contributions so will have far less money coming in. Therefore wants to claim CB to replace that loss of income means he will get £87 every four weeks.

Original poster
AlmostDoneIn · 29/03/2023 14:01

Yes

OP posts:
Original poster
AlmostDoneIn · 29/03/2023 14:05

This is very true. I think I will do that

OP posts:
dementedpixie · 29/03/2023 14:06

divorceadviceneeded · 29/03/2023 10:33

I might be wrong but is he claiming it so that he benefits from the NI implied contributions when you claim CB for kids under 12?

This only helps low earners or stay at home parents, not those already paying NI

Fluffodils · 29/03/2023 14:07

If its 50/50 and there's two kids then it seems fair?

dementedpixie · 29/03/2023 14:09

You may not get anywhere with hmrc as you have 50:50 care and have a claim for one of the other children.

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