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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

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Original poster

Advice on buying out my ex

11 replies

Leeleebeebee · 27/03/2023 01:11

I have been separated from my husband for 18 months and looking for some advice regarding buying him out of our house. I have remained in the marital home with our three children (all under 13) and he has moved in to a rented house. We split the mortgage 50/50 and he pays me a small amount of child maintenance each month. We have around 400k equity in the house. I can afford to remortage an extra 100k which would leave me still owing him 100k in equity. Can anyone please advise if a) it would be likely that a court would agree that I can pay the remaining equity when my youngest child turns 18 (in 11 years time) and if so b) would he be due interest on this?

Has anyone else been in a position where the house is not split 50/50? Not sure if aibu to say I have decorated most rooms since he left and replaced the kitchen which I feel would have increased its value? We are joint tenants in common and he earns around 80k a year and I earn around 110k. He only has one of our sons every other weekend and the other two stay with me 100% of the time. Thanks in advance.

OP posts:

LemonTT · 27/03/2023 01:59

Unless he agrees a court wouldn’t impose a mesher order on him. You have enough equity and income to find a new home. The best thing to do is agree a clean break and downsize your lives.

NorthernSpirit · 27/03/2023 09:25

It’s highly unlikely you would be awarded a Mesher order for 11 years. The courts prefer a clean break.

Even in the unlikely event that you were awarded a Mesher order for 11 years - you would be expected to pay the mortgage in full & any maintenance costs. Then in 11 years time (as you have held his capital for 11 years) - he benefits from an increase in price over those years.

There’s considerable equity in the property (£400k) - even if you split that 50/50, that’s £200k each.

On a £110k salary - you would be able to secure a mortgage of £495k. Add the equity & you have £695k to spend on a house. On that figure you have more than enough funds to buy a new house, realise your EH & have a clean break.

Better to sell and move on with your lives.

Reply2adviceonbuyingoutmyex · 27/03/2023 09:35

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Fourmagpies · 27/03/2023 09:55

Ours isn't complete yet so it may not be approved but we're aiming for 60/40 in my favour. STBXH can't have the children and he wants us to stay in the family home. He has a much larger pension pot than me.
Mesher orders aren't used as much these days and I would have thought given you both earn well that the court wouldn't agree. It doesn't need to be 50/50 but it needs to be fair. Worth speaking to a solicitor.

SeasonFinale · 27/03/2023 10:10

With you housing the 3 kids and him having contact with only one there is a good chance you could be awarded more than 50/50.

Also what is your pension position too? It may be that you could get 60/40 or even more in which case you may be able to afford to buy him out. Seek legal advice

Original poster

Leeleebeebee · 27/03/2023 10:30

Thanks everyone for your replies. It's a good reality check. I don't wish him any hardship but obviously from a selfish perspective would prefer for me and the kids to stay in the house. I don't think he's opposed to that but would likely prefer to keep paying half the mortgage as an investment until our youngest is 18.

OP posts:

millymollymoomoo · 27/03/2023 11:27

Unlikely to get a mesher as people have stated based on equity and you’re relative esrnings

I disagree with Pp re 60:40 being likely - based on equity, and also based on salaries 50:50 is likely outcome ( similar to my own divorce and was told 60:40 would not be awarded although I had 2 children not 3) and salaries were similar - I earned 100k vs husband 120k

LemonTT · 27/03/2023 12:17

I think it is cheeky to expect to have the property to yourself and have him pay half the mortgage and rent his own place. If you want to occupy the property and keep his equity at least pay the full mortgage. Which is what a judge would expect you to do. And yes he would still own half.

Soontobe60 · 27/03/2023 12:23

If the 400k equity represents, say, 50% of the value of the house, and you want to give him 100k, that represents 25% of the equity. If in 5 years time the house has increased in value to 1m, ie 200k from now, he would be entitled to 25% of 600k, is 125k.

millymollymoomoo · 27/03/2023 12:30

If you want to remain you need to buy him out ( his 50%) and pay all bills on your own

with your Sahara to can’t argue that you need this house ( as opposed to any other one with this being the only way to house yourself)

I think you’re being unfair, and if he was nice enough to allow you to remain he absolutely will retain his share based on value at point of sale gaining from any capital growth as his equity is tied up and you would have some use ( his lawyer would argue you owe him occupational rent for that ….)

Original poster

Leeleebeebee · 27/03/2023 12:45

Thanks everyone for your replies. I don't think it's as simple as him being "nice" letting me and our children stay in the house. Taking legalities out of the equation, the children went though a traumatic enough time with what he did so thankfully he recognised not to put them through anything more. Bringing legalities back in to mix, yes I do see he should be entitled to his share of the house and do intend for him to receive that. My aim is to understand what options are available to get him his share of the equity - and if selling the house or buying him out are those then so shall be it.

OP posts:

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