Some back ground.
My dad and his wife have broken up. He’s 68, retired clearly depressed.
He has moved into mine two weeks ago and I absolutely hate it. I haven’t lived with my dad since I was sixteen, I am 40 this year. I have two children and ended my relationship with their dad two plus years ago and have lived alone with my children since then. We are used to one another have our own ways around the house. My dads arrival has massively disrupted that. My teenage daughter is home educated so is at home all day while myself and my son are at work and school.
He is constantly criticising my daughter saying she’s always on the computer playing games ( she’s allowed to as long as she has completed her set work for that day) he’s suggested turning off the internet, taking her gaming system off her etc. He has said she should be doing her work 9-3 like schools hours. I’ve repeatedly explained she does not follow school schedules, she does maths, english and science (in prep for her igcse’s). His constant complaints are upsetting my daughter especially as she kindly gave up her room for him to stay in. Both my kids are resenting him now. He’s rude towards them, I’ve caught him on my security cameras hiding empty alcohol bottles in my recycling while we are out so he’s drinking all day (as it appears) while I’m at out and then criticising our home life. Which isn’t perfect but it’s ours, my children and me were very happy before he arrived. I want him to leave but don’t want to fall out with him, push him further to drink (he had a heart attack 2 years ago in august). I think he believes his ex will take him back and is just biding his time at mine until she changes her mind (she absolutely won’t and he’s been told this several times by her and myself).
So the advice I need is how on earth do I get him to leave in a polite way that doesn’t cause friction and resentment between anyone. I love my dad but love my kids and the peace we had before much more.