Divorcing without any assets or money

[monsterradeliciosa]

Hello, I would like help to understand what would happen when neither of us has any money or assets.

So I have initiated divorce online. Just thinking about the step after my five month wait. I thought a clean break would be the case, given I seek nothing, neither of us have anything, but it seems that's........

"only suitable when there is enough money to make both of you self sufficient."

So here's the thing. I'm socially housed, kicked him out, pay my rent and receive Universal Credit.

He went to his mum's, works (I think), not spoken to him since before Xmas, abuse was involved.

If he won't agree or won't speak to me, can I ask a judge to grant a clean break even though technically he's not self-sufficient, I mean he lives at his parents' but I would think he has capability for work he'd just be expected go to and work and rent, right?

This is my first time thinking about marriage and divorce because I spent five years in controlling abuse and never wanted to marry. Thanks.

You can’t give him what you don’t have. There shouldn’t be an issue getting a clean break.

Thank you for your help. This is what common sense told me but couldn't get confirmation of that from generic online stuff. I appreciate it, thank you.

I don’t know where you read that.
all financial agreements whether consent order or made by court have to follow “ fair settlement “
these are a list of 10 or so criteria to ensure that both parties have provision for the future based on need. It isn’t, as people often think 50;50. It may be if fair settlement is met and that’s done by 50:50, or where there are excess funds beyond basic needs

BUT, if you both have nowt, fair settlement of nowt is still..well nowt! But what a consent order does is secure your future from the ex coming back years later to demand assets you e built up. And you really must do that

if you have nowt, there’s no point not doing a consent order route but going to court for court to decide- they can’t conjure money out of no where either 🤦‍♀️. Hence why what you read is a bit dumb

you will need to first list all possible assets in relavent forms. D81 and form E. Form E is more detailed version of D81, and while not required by court for consent order, does make it easier to sure you don’t miss something. You may be surprised that you do have some assets like a car, pensions etc and these do, by law, need declaring legally by both of you

once you e done your D81, you can sit down and just confirm how you split any small assets you do find like pensions. You then need a solicitor to “draft” in legal speak what you’ve both agreed, and submit to courts .

The government divorce site is good and has all forms, but I’d also advise you to go to ADVICE NOW link at top of page and look at their guides on diy divorce and financial settlements. They list the “ fair settlement “ rules for example so you can check these for how they might apply to you both.

Sorry, just read he was abusive. Even more reason for consent order. But if he won’t consent you will need to get court to decide and impose financial settlement. That will cost you both. Before you can do that, you are now required to go first to meditate to see if they can get you to agree voluntarily

as abuse is involved is talk to womens aid as well, to get advice on how to proceed. He may agree to consent order route when faced with reality of escalating legal costs that mediate or, god forbid, a court case would cost.

I think you will get some legal aid if on benefits and abused- womens aid can probably sign post you

Hey @Whiteroomjoy thank you for your information.

Here's the thing, I know this is mumsnet, but I'm not your regular mumsnetter, I am socially housed on universal credit.

he is already borrowing from family to drag me through family court to try and get my daughter who is not his.

When I say I have nothing I mean it, and even if he did I would not want it.

I gave back all the jewellery he foisted on me via debt the day I kicked him out.

I have £6 in my bank and a huge energy debt.

I have no car and no familial property.

I've just had word my fee waiver and divorce has been accepted and served :D which is great news.

I suppose I can take a break now after the second stage, also with a fee waive.

I am currently under legal aid for my family court case he brought on me for contact with my beautiful daughter who wants nothing to do with him.

The only pension I have is state and I'm only 41 :)

Oh he'll try alright, he's try to hurt me and he will try to borrow more and more money to try and drag me through divorce court. I couldn't really care less as I have nothing and only care about my child.

Ime beware he might get access to your dd..

Of course he might, it's in court.
But he shouldn't, and he probably won't.

Took me 4 years to get exh denied access to my dc... Just saying don't take for granted he won't. You need a factual argument against

He's not the child's father and she doesn't want to see him, so that seems pretty factual!

How long was your husband in their lives if you don't mind me asking?

Less than 3 years..
It is naive to think he isn't the df being a factual no contact...

Sorry to hear that by the way @Bunnyishotandcross I think we may have interacted on here before about this.

Were there safeguarding concerns with yours? I would assume so otherwise you may have just given access.

Well I certainly don't think that at all, it's in court so obviously a possibility.

So why did you refuse the contact?

Didn't you have a child with him also?