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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

How do I get over it?

3 replies

Mads3216 · 20/02/2023 16:20

Could really do with some advice on how to move on from my long term abusive relationship. We were together a long time and were due to be married, over the years what I thought was care was control and the odd push/shove/strangle I believed I provoked. My personality disappeared along with my self confidence. The home we made is being sold and the dog we bought together I'll lose.
Everyday I try to remind myself why we're not together - all the nasty things he said, the many times he left me hanging as to whether he wanted me and then when he flipped back to being nice. Every time I think I'm getting somewhere I start to miss him and the life we had.... the life I still keep thinking I want. To the point I start to think maybe I imagined it all and I'm going crazy.
When I leave the house for a few days to get some space , I miss it like crazy and start to think is it all worth it?

OP posts:
cloudglazer · 20/02/2023 16:38

I am really sorry you experienced this abuse. Have you been in touch with a domestic violence charity? They may be able to offer you some support, and also refer you to counselling.

Take care

Mads3216 · 20/02/2023 16:50

@cloudglazer Hi, I have but I'm waiting for someone to contact me to enroll me on the freedom programme.

OP posts:
cloudglazer · 20/02/2023 18:55

I hope it comes through for you very soon. You have done the right thing in getting out. The memories of the times that were good weren't really good. It was to keep you there.

This poem might help you

www.mindfulnesstherapy.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/autobiography-in-five-chapters-portia-nelson.pdf

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