Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

He's left. I need advice

7 replies

Hopefulforthefuturino · 12/02/2023 16:07

I told my partner of 10 years who I share 2 children with that it was over 2 days ago. He's been controlling both financially and emotionally for years and I've finally had enough. He's been drinking 12 cans of cider a day for more years than I can count. He has cut down to 4 a day in the last week as I told him how unhappy I was with it. But I decided Friday that I don't want this relationship anymore. He left and went to his dad's. He says he won't let me keep the house and will take the children from me. I've applied for an occupation order and I've contacted a mediator for the children. I'm willing to be fair and to do everything that I can in the children's best interests and to help them through this. What am i supposed to do next? I'm so stressed and scared about what he will do next. He's currently sending me lovey messages saying how he will change and I don't have to do this. He's taken the children to his dad's overnight and is bringing them back today as they're obviously at school tomorrow. He's been telling me my dd8 doesnt want to come home and wants to stay there. Although he has promised to bring her back. Will he get the house? Despite his abusive ways? I have no where else to go, I burned all my bridges with my family since being with him as he doesn't like any of them and I haven't seen them. I put up with everything for 10 years to keep the peace but I just cant anymore. Any help would be massively appreciated. Xx

OP posts:
millymollymoomoo · 12/02/2023 16:15

You’ll have to work out what to do re the house and how to split all your assets fairly

it will depend on earnings and earnings potential
other assets available ( pensions?)
Housing children
residency and child arrangements
whether you can afford to buy him out and take over the mortgage and bills

many other factors so noone here can answer that question

on what grounds are you seeking occupation order ?

millymollymoomoo · 12/02/2023 16:16

Actually, are you even married ?
if not then housing is based on how you own the property now

KangarooKenny · 12/02/2023 16:17

Is your name on the mortgage/deeds ?

LoveMAFS · 12/02/2023 16:28

It doesn't matter if your name is on the deeds or not. My name wasn't on the deeds and I kept the house.

KangarooKenny · 12/02/2023 16:30

LoveMAFS · 12/02/2023 16:28

It doesn't matter if your name is on the deeds or not. My name wasn't on the deeds and I kept the house.

Even though you weren’t married ?

millymollymoomoo · 12/02/2023 16:53

It does matter if you are not married
if you’re not married the only thing they matters is whose name is on the deeds and how you own the house

Hopefulforthefuturino · 12/02/2023 20:15

Sorry I should've said, my heads scatty. It's a housing association house. We're both on the tenancy. My eldest lives here with us and if I lost the house, so would she. Surely that wouldn't happen?? Right?

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread