ADVICE needed!

[MaryBridgetJones]

I left my husband for someone else, started off as an emotional affair (please don’t judge) he was a very good friend and my marriage was not in a good place.
18 months down the line I’m midst divorce and we decided to take a break as he was putting pressure on me to move things forward and I was just trying to get through the divorce.
We struggled not to see each other or speak every day and we were sleeping together still.
it turned out in this time, he has slept with two other women and given me something to remember them by 🤮 which is why he had to tell me.
Even writing this makes me know the answer, but I should absolutely move on as hard as this is?
And yes I probably deserved it!

He is a shit, isn't he? You got into the EA because your marriage wasn't in a good place. Put them both behind you and make a fresh start.

No judgement here - time to draw a line, dump the boyfriend, and take some time out on your own.

if this man was the catalyst that motivated you to leave an unhappy marriage then thats not a bad thing. The fact that you are taking a break from a man who was putting pressure on you to move things forward at a time you were dealing with the stress of your divorce shows that this is not the right man for you. The infection he has passed on doubly highlights he’s not worthy of you.

i agree with taking time out of relationships while you are still in a vulnerable place. This is the time we are most likely to end up seeing someone totally unsuitable. Concentrate on yourself, doing things that you enjoy for the time being and recovering from everything you’ve been through. No judgement here either,

You struggled not to see each other. He didn't.

Thank you so much for your replies, they have really helped and also confirmed exactly what I was thinking! X

Op you didn’t and don’t deserve that at all

hopefully it’s treatable so you can put it behind you, move on, don’t look back.

give yourself time to be alone and discover you
sounds like

When it comes to relationships alot of the answers we need are in our gut. Re stis that could happen to anyone who doesn't use protection, someone could sleep with 1 person and be unlucky so try not to beat yourself up about that.

Sometimes people jump in to affairs as a distraction or a way out of their marriage. Perhaps that's what this relationship was and it ran its course.

Re the other man pressuring you to get divorced, i can understand that as he may have felt you were not serious re permanently ending things with your husband and would have had his own needs. However, his needs didn't match yours which is understandable too as divorce can be v stressful so you guys weren't in the same place.

For me things come down to honesty and communication. If this guy wasnt honest that he was having unprotected sex with other women at the same time as you, that would be a deal breaker for many as he wasn't being honest or caring about your health and well being either and who wants to be with someone like tha?