Posting here as well as legal matters, it’s quite long sorry!
My DH and his siblings each are entitled to
a fairly substantial inheritance. BIL was with his partner for about 4 years and then they decided to buy a house with his inheritance money. Both of their names are on the paperwork which was an unwelcome surprise to the rest of his family, as this was before they were married.
They got married about a year later, it was a fairly big expensive wedding in her home country. On returning to the UK, SIL started a Masters which has helped her get on the career path she is on now. After the wedding they were both unemployed and her and BIL’s lifestyle and the masters was funded by the inheritance money.
Soon after their marriage, the news came that they would be asking for the rest of BIL’s share of the inheritance to buy her family a house in her home country. There was some hesitance in DHs family but the money was given as it was intended for BIL. SIL and BIL also asked for an extra £50K to pay off SIL’s family’s debts which was refused, this resulted in SIL writing a nasty email to MIL (who holds the purse strings as it were). The house for her family was bought and again is in both BIL and SIL names.
SIL is now enjoying her career and spent the last year working overseas and saw BIL for just a few weeks throughout this time. She came back to the UK for a few days after new year and we saw them last night. They broke the news that they are getting a divorce, in fact they already signed papers 6 months ago.
The thing is that they have signed papers to say that they will not use any lawyers. DH and I have been digesting this and feel BIL has been very naive. We don’t know the exact reasons for the divorce, we know they’ve been having difficulties since they were married really, and we believe that the divorce is most if not all down to SIL as BIL has always been completely besotted and would do anything for SIL.
But they presented the news to us very casually, saying they still love each other and will still be involved in each other’s lives. It’s not my business at the end of the day but I think this is a terrible idea and that a clean break is a much more sensible option. DH and I worry that she has taken advantage of him, he is almost too sweet and would never dream of putting her family in an uncomfortable position ie asking them to buy him out of the house, as they wouldn’t be able to afford to do so.
they are now getting a mortgage on their house to pay for renovations for both their and SIL’s family’s house. It’s all very messy and seems to be mostly working in SIL’s favour.
I worry that one day if/when he meets someone else, only then will he realise that he has been screwed over as he won’t have the same opportunity to buy a house etc, meanwhile ex-SIL and her family will continue to profit from his generosity.
As an extra detail SIL has also alienated BIL from his father as she fell out with him and his wife just before the wedding, so she has done a fair amount of damage and is now leaving BIL high and dry with family relationships harmed and half of his inheritance gone.
What can we do to help him here? DH will ask him if there is any way there may be a loophole to get a lawyer involved but I think even if there was he may not want to pursue this.
Thanks for any advice.