Buying your own home

[xfluffycookiex]

How did you all move on?

3 weeks ago he said he is done. After 20years of financially being us I don’t know how to do it on my own and I’m finding this aspect very scary and the prospect of moving house on my own and getting a mortgage on my own.

I work 30 hours admin for nhs so basic wages. I’m hoping to have 80k from the sale of our house. 100k would be nice.

Thinking of asking for a 60/40 split as he earns 5 times as much as me but this will be totally down to him and how he wants his kids to live with me. This would make the above figure more as I’ve done that on 50/50 split.

renting in my mind is not a option I need to buy but how do you do that when your wages are low. Help to buy seems to have gone. Do new builds offer any help for these situations? Even the basic 3 bed house in council estate are topping £200k in my area.

I have got a mortgage appointment booked for the new year when hopefully I’ll understand my financial situation a bit better and will have had some valuations done on the house.

tia

Are you married op
what ages are your children?

Not married no rights so what ever happens will be out the goodness of his heart.

kids are 8, 13, nearly 16.

My ex earns a lot less than me. There is no automatic right to home ownership? Renting - as far as I'm led to believe - is a perfectly acceptable housing proposal on divorce/splitting up. Just because he has a mortgage raising capacity doesn't mean you must have one too. If £200k is an average value on your area and you get £100k from the sale of your current home then you should be able to raise a mortgage for the remaining 50%?

30 hours isn't full time employment - can you increase your hours now your children are older?

I upped my hours so I could get more mortgage (and reduced them after, helpful boss), I paid a real estate agent to help me find and buy a house (I just couldn't do the stuff myself on top of everything else) and I asked friends to help me move.

It helps to make lists, once it's written down you don't have to remember it. Make lists for everything: the type of house you need, the extra furniture you need, your finances, your mortgage application, practicalities after you've moved (internet, tv, mailing everyone your new address, hell I even made a list of things I wanted to do when I was alone and which mutual friends to keep or dump.

Sometimes it all felt as too much, like a mountain of stuff to do but that's when you should really call a friend or come on here to offload. You'll get there one step at a time and you'll be fine.

How your" kids live with you " will be up to you. How his "kids live with him" will be up to him.

You are no longer together, and your obligations to your children are equal but no longer joint.

You need to begin to look for full time employment. The need to increase your income will be critical and fortunately your children are old enough for you to work full time. Full time employment will be an asset in obtaining a mortgage. None of the responsibilities facing you are insurmountable and many women and men manage their lives without the help of a spouse or partner. You have come late to the game, but you are no less capable.

You will need to change your mindset and stop thinking that he has more of an obligation because of his income. Better to begin thinking about how , why, and when you need to increase your earning potential.

You can handle this situation. At a minimum, even if you do not end up with enough money for a substantial deposit towards a purchase, you should have enough to rent while you sort your options. O

Speak to a mortgage broker and get the house valuation done. I would estimate how much equity you have on 50% as you aren't married. You will also need a solicitor for buying and selling the property. Have a look at what's available in your price bracket and go from there.
I'm just in the process of buying my own place and can't wait to move in so I can fully move on.

Hi.

I have contacted mortgage broker for simplicity but could have done myself, at 54 and on a not to great a salary I had little hope I would be able to borrow but 4 times my salary was on offer. I'm hoping for a good deposit from sale of my marital home too.

Good luck with your progress.

If you are not going to do 5050 childcare, you should receive child maintenance from your ex

You probably need to increase your working hours to full time too. This would also help you to pay into your own private pension too for your future.