Child contact with potential paedophile

[AdviceGreatlyAppreciatedPlease]

I'm in the middle of a very lengthy child arrangements order. My ex us being investigated by the police for severe domestic abuse of every single type. He is also now being investigated for extreme pornography. CPS defines this as:

An extreme pornographic image is an image which meets four criteria. It is:

Pornographic ("of such a nature that it must reasonably be assumed to have been produced solely or principally for the purpose of sexual arousal"), and

Grossly offensive, disgusting or otherwise of an obscene character, and

Portrays in an explicit and realistic way any of the following:

An act which threatens a person's life, or

An act which results, or is likely to result, in serious injury to a person's anus, breasts or genitals, or

An act which involves sexual interference with a human corpse (necrophilia), or

A person performing an act of intercourse or oral sex with an animal (whether dead or alive) (bestiality), or

An act which involves the non-consensual penetration of a person's vagina, anus or mouth by another with the other person's penis or part of the other person’s body or anything else (rape or assault by penetration)

and

A reasonable person looking at the image would think that the persons or animals were real.

I don't know what the images are that the police have found, they will not tell the court. The judge has ordered an increase in contact knowing the above.

Is there anything I can do or anywhere I can go to ask why this is happening? It makes absolutely no sense to me. Can someone explain how this is in the best interests of 3 very young children from a legal point of view?

Oh god this sounds awful. Contact social services and get cafcass involved. He sounds risky. Im so sorry for what you are going through. See if DV charities can help.. they have contacts and unfortunately have probably been through similar.

Yes to the above, children's social care and carcass. I work in this field. If you already have a social worker and they are useless, raise a formal complaint.

Also was he convicted of any of the abuse against you? Does he have a probation officer?

There are documented accounts of family court ordering fathers with sexual offences contact as 'all children need contact with a father'. They have then gone on to commit terrible offences. I agree with contact with fathers, I absolutely do, but the risk needs to be acknowledged and suitability assessed. Definitely ring social services. I think they will help.

I think i might be inclined if no one helps to not comply with the order then when you are brought back to court for being in contempt telling the court that you weighed up the risk against your children and whilst you want to follow orders you are exercising your PR to protect them.

Social Services are involved due to threats on the lives of children.

CAFCASS are involved and despite all the evidence of abuse/rape etc they think he is a good father because he has behaved for a few hours a week during supervised contact.

I have had help from several charities who say there's nothing they can do as the judge is in charge.

I have raised several complaints with the children's caseworker who has been caught out lying about the children in reports but the judge has ignored me pointing out the inconsistencies.

He is still being investigated, but the amount of proof makes me think it's a question of a custodial or suspended sentence rather than IF there's a conviction. So no probation officer yet.

It has been said by the caseworker that I have imagined or made up the abuse, and the judge believes them because they are a professional. I am being portrayed as a mentally ill and bitter ex wife with intractable hostility. I have been threatened through a court document sanctioned by the judge with being accused of parental alienation if I do not comply.

I am mentally ill in that I am traumatised by decades of abuse. I am not bitter, I just want him to leave us alone. He never cared about the children until I found out what he had been doing and stopped contact.

Dont comply with order. Say you were awaiting the outcome of the police enquiries and in the meantime you will continue with supervised contact. Write to the court and cc cafcass in now and say you want an emergency prohibited steps order on the basis of the risk and outstanding police enquiries. It shows you are being pro active and respecting the court. It costs about £250 and can be done online right now. Should take less than 30 mins. Include you ate contacting social services and police for guidance first thing.

Do you have help from DV charity's and your GP to prove his allegations arebt true. He cant allege you are mentally ill without evidence yet you get penalised for child alienation without evidence. Fuck this fucking trend /fathers for justice retoric about children needing a father despite the risk/abuse. Its disgusting

Look its a civil court and you have valid reason you are justified to ask to be investigated. Dont be frightened.

just to let you know, possession of extreme images is slightly different to child abuse images. Possess of extreme images would not necessarily mean that he is a paeodphile.

I have tried to say to wait for the outcome but his barrister keeps saying how that could be years and it's unfair on the children to only have artificial contact with their father. It has been a long time but there's a lot of evidence to go through. I think perhaps he may be officially charged soon but I believe he's trying to increase contact to lower any potential sentence.

I have also documented their refusal to go and that two of them have autism but my ex thinks that I have lied to get that diagnosed to use against him in court. I am being told they are refusing to go because I am stressed and I should stop being stressed.

Do you know which document I could complete for the order? I can look at the guidance and pretty accurately guess what the outcome will be as I've got quite good at that.

Additionally he has taken me back to court for pointless things between court hearings multiple times. Nothing worth spending thousands of pounds on barristers for that could not wait.

Social Services are trying to arrange therapy for the children but the children's guardian thinks they don't need it and I'm doing it for some sort of calculating or malicious reasons. I'm not sure what independent therapy could be used for other than their wellbeing?

He has said I'm mentally ill and that I've made everything up because he had affairs. Despite me having known about affairs for a significant time before I left and literally have messages where he admits what he did. This does sadly include things such as rape.

I agree it is disgusting. Being biologically related does not offer protection from abuse.

I've had to appeal twice which I believe has made the judge even more angry. So I'm not holding out any hope for a complaints process. I have already made a complaint about a previous judge making an illegal order against me which went nowhere.

I know it may not be child abuse images, but I don't know for certain and I don't think I'd want someone who looks at necrophilia or bestiality around any children either. It's insane that nobody thinks that that kind of person should raise a child yet courts don't seem to care. Especially boys, no boy should be raised by a rapist.

I guess my point is that the judge doesn't know he's not a paedophile and doesn't think that the possibility of that is a danger to children. I might as well have stayed with him at this point.

I think that until there is some clarity on the images, you need to be very careful about making any sort of paedophile type accusation. It will only serve to muddy the waters.

That's my point though, the judge doesn't know. How could someone think that's an acceptable risk? Even if it is one of the other types of images, that person still should not be around children, they're a sex offender. Someone who raped their partner with their child in the same room is not someone to be trusted.

Not splitting hairs here, but the DV and rape stuff is a separate matter entirely.

It is yes. As are the threats against children's lives, I just don't understand how anybody thinks that sort of person can bring up children. The likelihood of abuse once they're unsupervised is enormous. I am terrified every time they are at contact that I'm going to have a call saying they've been killed.

Even if they're not, the boys are seeing that rape and abuse is not punished and the girl is seeing that it is acceptable treatment.

I think its very messy. I think do the emergency prohibited steps application, it has to be heard in days. Voice your concerns. You dont need a barrister. Just go and voice your concerns its on record then and 100% speak to social worker and cafcass for guidance. The form is on the family court website.

Good luck OP, keep us posted.

Thank you, I am researching the PSO now.

You must contact a child protection officer at the police and every agency you can get hold of. Women's aid might help.
Do.not.let.them.go.