My ex decided to take me to court over our 6 year old girl at the beginning of the year. His intentions were to get 50:50 in writing and he also accused me of mentally abusing her. Since we split over 3 year ago, he had her starting with a few days, then nights, then eventually he told me he was having her 50:50 whether I liked it or not and had no god given right to deny him that. Since this, I’ve never gone against the ‘agreement’, always abiding by the days and times. Him on the other hand, was very lax with the times, dropping her 20 minutes after and even before, and also telling me he was having her an extra night to suit his family event. Despite telling him me and my partner already had plans for when she got back. Nonetheless we have got used to him and didn’t kick up a fuss. So the irony of him wanting 50:50 in writing despite him being the only one who goes against it isn’t lost on me…
Anyway, he wrote up a 30 page parenting plan, to which the court gave him a funny look, telling us to come to an agreement on days and the 50:50, meaning a second court date wasn’t necessary. He proposed a new schedule which in fairness works better for everyone involved and means no contact between us minus the school holidays. I agreed to the new days and 50:50 and even some of his proposed requests (more than I felt I was told to do). He then told me he wanted me to agree to more before sending it off the court. Eventually I told him I will only being agreeing to what I was told to, which I was happy to do, and if he wasn’t happy with that then I was more than prepared to go back to court.
Our second court date is approaching and I’m just a bit worried about whether they will bring these ridiculous requests up and pressure me into agreeing. I’m just after some info or people with experience on this matter than can hopefully put my mind at ease.
Just some information…
I have had a partner for just over 2 years and we have a baby girl, both girls are obsessed with each other. We all are very happy and get on amazingly.
He has a partner with 2 children (not his) and is not very hands on. Leaving his partner, clubs and family to look after her after school until he’s finished work on his days. Despite me feeling this isn’t fair, court told me it doesn’t matter and as long as he has suitable childcare arrangements, that is all that matters. He is also very manipulative and smart, which worries me that the court might lean towards him.
The requests I can’t agree on are:
We agreed we would have her for the whole day on mine and his birthday, but I also asked for her to be able to spend her sisters birthday with us. To which he responded he wants his partner and partners children’s birthdays also added. Obviously I’m not happy with this, especially as one of her children has the same birthday as my other child.
He moved out of town and has told me I need to do pick ups and drops alternately during the school holidays. I do not drive and he knows that, if I were to walk, it would take over 1 hour 20 there and 1 hour 20 back. With 2 children. One who is allergic to walking😂. He then requested that my partner would do the pick ups and drops offs and told me it was for me to talk to me about it. My partner works long days and various shifts so this isn’t possible and even if it was I wouldn’t allow it.
I know this was long but I’ve been meaning to do this for a while but now with the court date approaching I have panicked and it’s just all come out.
Thanks for any responses!