Inheritance and separation

[KensingtonStation]

H and I are currently separated for nearly a year and not likely to reconcile although i would like to, but divorce not being discussed at this point for various reasons.

My parents are elderly, unwell and not likely to live much longer. They are wealthy. This sounds brutally mercenary, but if we remain in limbo, living apart but no financial or legal arrangements, would H have a claim that any (potentially substantial) inheritance would be a family asset?

Siblings are concerned this is playing into why H won't move forward with divorce. I think that if this was his end game, he would be more likely not to have left.

Yes he would. You need to divorce him now.

Yes, it's why my sis-in-law won't divorce my dbil. His DM is likely to die within a year.

You need to move things on or face a division of marital assets which will include your inheritance....
He's playing the waiting game .....at your expense.

You don't need his permission to file for no fault divorce. Do it ASAP.

Seek legal advice. Inheritance can be protected. You could also seek financial separation?

I’m no expert but I don’t believe inheritance automatically forms part of any marital assets if it is kept completely separate and not merged into any joint account or used for any joint purchases/investments? I could be wrong but regardless you need to get legal advice asap as to where you would stand with this.

Seeing as you are already living apart, and have been for some while (and I assume you could easily provide proof of this?) then I don’t think any inheritance that you receive will necessarily need to be shared with him.
Get legal advice as soon as you can, and a financial document drawn up if possible. It’s not expensive to have a quick half hour conversation with a lawyer, to see if you like them and could work with them.

Thanks, but I don't want to divorce. I want to reconcile. But, in parallel, I am trying to make sure I have full understanding of my position should it come to that.

I spoke with a lawyer about 3 months ago, but had not realised how frail my parents actually are at that point. I will go back to them, as I think we need to at least sort an interim financial agreement.

If you are separated/living apart at the time of their passing that may make a difference?

If you are still married, there a good chance he could argue that any inheritance should be included as part of the martial pot, if the current assets are not enough to reasonably provide for both parties

You really need legal advice. I am in Aus now but my legal training was in the UK and I would think that everything, including inheritance, is in the asset pool until the point of divorce which is why people are advised not to let their financial settlement slide when they split. I understand you want to reconcile but I would suggest that you need to really think about the possibility that your husband is stringing you along for potential financial gain. I totally get why you would prefer not to think about that but would hate to see you regretful in 20 years time when your ex has half of your parents’ money.

Well I think you need to open your eyes here. Hoping to reconcile with him is naive. You have been separated for a year and the only reason he hasn’t progressed with a divorce is so he can get your parents inheritance. You need to wise up sharp . Even your sister is concerned about his motives. I would suggest your parents change there will to exclude you. You can get an agreement with your sibling that she will give you’d share once divorced.

Don’t bother getting divorced, he can have half your inheritance then. Oh well!

Oh you need to get this sorted, you can legally separate your finances if you're separated without divorcing so do it quick as he's clearly waiting for you to get it if he's the one who doesn't want to reconcile.

I'm so sorry you are in this position.

I m afraid that I just can't imagine wanting to reconcile with someone whose only motive in not divorcing is to claim part of your inheritance.

Seriously! He gets it until the divorce is done. No two ways about it. You need to get that sorted urgently as divorces can't last a long time (28 months sometimes)

I agree with the tough words of @mynameisbrian

You aren't going to get back together. You said yourself in the OP it was 'unlikely'.

OP I think in your circumstances your inheritance can be protected - you've been separated for a year, and your parents are very much alive. Any inheritance (especially where there is £££ to sort) can take aaaaaages to process, and you have no idea of when this might happen, never mind what their will says.

The thing I would be very wary of is that in the event of you receiving the inheritance during or before finances from your marriage are resolved, is that your 'needs' from the marital pot will be diminished, and you will likely get a much smaller share than your ex.

Time to wake up and smell the coffee op. If you want to reconcile what steps are you BOTH taking? Otherwise if he is just hanging on waiting for your parents to die, he's a despicable man who you should divorce (and expedite financial resolution) as soon as possible.

In theory an ex wife or husband can make a claim on inheritance even after divorce in certain situations, if they haven't re-married, or there was no clean break order or if the death and subsequent inheritance occurs soon after the divorce. So being totally honest, you need legal advice asap about the best way to protect your potential inheritance. Divorce can be a lengthy process.

Hopefully he won't be successful in making any sort of claim but it's important you know the facts. Some replies here are seriously misleading. It's really not as simple as him having no right to claim once you're divorced

Why can't you divorce and remarry then if you reconcile? I absolutely would not be in a position that someone who has left me would then be able to access any money from my family.

It sounds like you want to reconcile but he doesn't? If you don't take steps to divorce now, he'll walk away with half of your parents money. Are you really going to let that happen? Sounds like he is stringing you along until your parents pass away, and you are allowing him to in the hope you get back together. You need to wake up!

If they die before you divorce then the inheritance will need to be declared. The execution of the will probably isn’t relevant. He will in any case know you have a significant asset that you need to declare.

you would have a v strong case to ring fence it. But it would mean you have little or no case to argue for a larger share of assets. Whilst he might have a stronger argument. That might or might not make a difference to what the divorce settlement looks like.

If he wanted a share of the inheritance he would not have left you. But he might be delaying if he wants a better settlement from the existing marital pot.

You need to wise up quickly.

Have a grown up conversation- "I would like to try again with our marriage, would you" if the answer is no.

Then File for divorce that day.
Protect your inheritance/assets.

My parent's wills are written that if a child is going through separation or divorce when they die, the child doesn't get the money until it's over. You need legal advice asap but I would have thought a codicil to this effect might be the simplest route.

...parents'...