Coping with an ex moving on

[Worriesandwobbles]

My ex messaged yesterday to let me know he is dating someone. It shouldn't have come as a surprise, but it did. It shouldn't have upset me so much, but I was devastated. I haven't stopped crying. We were married 17 years and only separated in January. It was a mutual split and I know the relationship wasn't fixable, but we were actually getting on better than ever this summer and the whole time he was on sites actively seeking someone else. Dating is the furthest thing from my mind and I have been completely focused on my children. I feel stupid and angry but mostly sad. I don't know how I am going to even be able to look at him let alone be friendly. I am hoping someone else appreciates what I am going through.

I don't mean to be mean, but what did you expect?

If you're divorced, you're divorced. It's natural for someone to explore the world if he wants to.

It's fine If it's not been on your mind, but if you've positioned this where he has more time, he's bound to want to seek company.

I'm sorry it hurts, but divorce is a shitty process. I wish you well moving forward and hope you find peace.

Thanks. Maybe it's exactly what I needed to make that emotional break myself. We all heal in our own time.

It's inevitable but so so hard when it happens. I felt like I'd been punched in the gut tbh! BUT it gets easier I promise. Don't let the feelings of pain show in your behaviour or actions. Keep it light and let him carry on. It's definitely for the best.

I lost the plot trying to cope with the whole situation and now 4 years on I can see that I needed to just let it be.

I really feel for you though x

Hugs for you OP 🤗
17 years is a long time to be married and I think him already dating someone is just way too early and kind of rude tbh. I would feel exactly like you. I know you both mutually ended it but I feel him being on dating sites after you broke almost 5-6 months ago just seems very insensitive.

I would just try to focus on yourself, and take time for you and anything that can keep your mind occupied.

I am going through a rough patch in my marriage right now so I can really sympathise.

Xxx

Sendings hugs after 18 years my ex was with someone else within 7 weeks.

It absolutely broke me at the time but a year on I’m in a better place. Everyone heals at there own pace I’ve thrown myself into making sure my boys are happy and but meeting anyone else on the back burner.